If you're like me and you're in limbo between being a teenager and being an "adult," you're finding the whole thing discombobulating. One minute we're still 19 and the next we're 20 and forced to leave these teen years behind. Suddenly, a whole 60 seconds pass and we're not teenagers anymore.
Being 19 feels a lot like being a junior in high school. It's the year others start expecting things out of you like where you're going to college, what major you're looking at, how your grades are. And then it's time to take the dreaded ACT/SAT exam and you're drowning.
Nineteen is a bit like that except you're stuck in the middle of a major you don't like, your teachers are cracking down like a whip and your roommates won't clean up after themselves. The excitement and stress of your freshman year has worn off, but you're not yet a seasoned pro.
It's limbo.
I'm not turning 20 for another seven months, so I've still got time to bask in this state of mind. There are parts of me that wish these seven months start to feel like a dream, but the other half of me feels rooted to this number.
What exactly happens when we turn 20? The world doesn't end, obviously. It's not 21, obviously. There's nothing different about it, but there is something so different about it at the same time.
So, what do we do to prepare for this leap? What do we have to know?
1. Being 20 doesn't mean that you have to have everything figured out.
2. Just because you're not a teenager anymore, doesn't mean that you shouldn't stop having fun.
3. No one expects you to know what you're doing anymore than they did when you were 19. Twenty isn't the deadline for a new life.
4. Don't expect to make a lot of money. Many people have the idea that only teenagers have to work fast food and retail jobs, and that's far from the truth. Keep your day job, folks.
5. Stay in school. If you think 20 is the start of a countdown for a degree, you're wrong. Life happens and sometimes credits fall through, or you fail a class. Don't rush to graduate. You actually have to be an adult when that happens.
6. No one expects you to have a serious relationship. Just because you're not a teen anymore doesn't mean that marriage or babies should be your number one priority. Hey, if that's where you're at, that's where you're at. Just know it's not expected for you to settle down now.
7. Keep in contact with your friends. It's easy to lose yourself to the idea that you're all grown up now that you're 20, but that's not always the case. Your friends in your teenage years are growing too, so don't leave them behind.
8. Keep your head up. Despite this list, when you're 20, people will start to expect some things from you. It's going to happen. It may not be what I've listed, but expectations get high as you get further along in life. Even if you don't get what you want straight out of the gate, keep your head up. At 20, you've got plenty of time to move forward.
9. Avoid pettiness. This is one of the things I think we must leave behind in our "teen" years. Even though we're still young, this isn't high school anymore and cattiness isn't cute in the office.
10. Don't be afraid to change your opinions. Everyone grows in due time. At 20, you're going to see new things as you move up the ladder, and that can shape your very core being. Don't be afraid to change how you feel, just because you want to hang on to an adolescent perspective. It's scary, but it could and probably will happen. That's OK.
11. Call a loved one. Life gets even more hectic the older you get. Start making it a point now to call a loved one up a few times a week. Pick the one person you know loves you, keep them informed of your life and listen to them talk. That way, when the world of being 20 get's too much, or maybe even when you hit 25, you'll have this person to comfort you, and vice versa.
12. Don't do anything stupid. This one is a given.
13. Start keeping a journal. This was the worst while being in the teens. Most likely it was a required assignment from your high school English teacher (like me), and you want to avoid it as much as possible now. I get it. But you don't have to write in it everyday. When you hit 20, you're going to start having real life experiences. That's not to erase anything that may have happened in your teens, but after 20 hits, you're in the midst of truly growing up and into yourself, and that's going to have more memorable moments than you could ever dream.
14. Take time for yourself. Netflix and chill totally counts. Your mental, emotional, and physical health is so important as you grow older. You are in charge of you.
15. Stop trying to please anyone but yourself. Even if this isn't a worry for you now, it could be later. I want to take the time specifically to point out that you do not have to please anyone except yourself. Twenty is the start of an era where you have to be in charge of what makes you happy.
16. Be adventurous.
17. Be kind.
18. Be confident.
19. Know that you are the most important thing.
