Many adults are dumbfounded by a concept most teens and 20 somethings can't even find a way to explain: The Talking Phase. Basically two people decide they maybe, kind of, sort of, a little, might like each other. So they start talking. By talking I mean they text, Facetime, meet up at functions, take each other to date functions, get lunch, have sleep overs and probably also do the naughty, but maybe not. This stage in a relationship is different for every pair of dating challenged millennials. Most of my generation has hopped on the "I hate this ridiculous stage" or the "What even is this crap" bandwagon already. All I'm saying is maybe this stage isn't SO bad because:
1. There are no labels.
No commitment, no problem.
2. You can go out whenever you want.
And not feel guilty about it.
3. You can go out with whoever you want.
And not feel as guilty unless you have already caught the feels in which case this stage is not for you anyway.
4. Technically.
This remains the key word to a successful talking phase. Technically, you didn't do anything wrong because you're not technically in a relationship.
5. You don't have to tell your parents about them.
6. You don't have to come up with catchy Instagram captions for your mediocre couple pictures.
You can just only post the best of your your many dates and caption them with a simple explanation of what you guys did together like "Formal 2k16 #letsgooooo."
7. You can still Snapchat that almost ex you kind of wish you always hooked up with.
Because it's really hard to focus on just one person.
8. You don't have to buy them gifts.
I repeat YOU DON"T HAVE TO BUY THEM GIFTS.
9. You don't have to pretend you like the gifts they get you.
I mean still be nice but if some fool caught the feels while you were just trying to chill by all means, let them know you aren't really into the color pink, or flowers, or real romance.
10. You never have to do anything you don't want to do.
He can't guilt you into going to his favorite restaurant because you could just go wherever without him. You care even less than the honey badger.
11. You can actually contribute to the conversation when your girlfriends are bragging about their other halves.
...Or complaining. Either way, when people are talking about their "someone," you automatically have someone to talk about too.
12.You can wear sweatpants when you hang out.
Unless you've already caught the feels in which case you probably need to dress to impress occasionally and this stage is no longer for you.
13. You can use the "I have a boyfriend/Girlfriend" excuse.
Obviously it wouldn't really be true but even if you just say you're talking to someone, most people back off.
14. You still always have a date to things that require one.
Nine out of ten times this person will be free to go to your events because they think you're cute or something.
15. You can access their flaws before committing to dealing with them indefinitely.
I mean we all have baggage and sometimes it's easier to walk away from someone else's than to let it tear you down trying to carry it all.
16. You have someone to do all the best parts of relationships with.
Cuddling, Netflix bingeing, ice cream dates, late night conversations about life (maybe), Formals and semi-formals, good morning texts, and breakfast at McDonalds.
17. You don't have to tell them anything you don't want to.
"Why're you so afraid of commitment?"
"That's for me to know and you to find out... Wait no."
18. You can end this psuedo-relationship whenever you stop feelin' it, however you want to.
You don't owe this person much because there was never any explicit commitment to begin with. If you're the type of person that just can't end things in person, then you can text and it's still pretty acceptable.
Dating has changed so much over the years but this additional phase is finally an idea I can get behind. I can't say I like relationships and I can't say the first thing on my list of stuff to do is commit to one person during college, but I do occasionally like someone enough to keep them around a little longer. The talking phase was made for me. Of course some people are starting to draw some lines in the gray area known as "talking" but for now at least the key word remains technically. My warning before jumping into a talking phase situation is to know yourself. The only way to love it as much as I do is to be the one that cares less. If you catch the feels just be honest with yourself and with your almost, kind of, significant other. They deserve to know if they might be hurting you with their actions so you can drop them, move on and be happy. Plus they might be thinking the same and you could end up being even happier by making it official. Either way, just know yourself and happy "talking!"
