If you are anything like me, you understand what it is like to be constantly cold. No amount of blankets can warm your body, and no amount of hot beverages can warm your soul. You will never understand people who love winter, and you secretly loathe the people who do not need to wear a sweatshirt on summer evenings to stay warm.
1. You sleep with about 500 blankets
The only acceptable way to sleep is in blanket burrito position, which ensures optimal warmth and comfort.
2. Getting out of bed when it's cold out is nearly impossible
3. Your hands are always cold
To anyone who has to shake or hold my hands: I am sorry. The temperature of my hands is approximately -50 degrees, and I'm fairly certain that coming in contact with my hands is a form of cruel and unusual punishment.
4. The same thing applies to your feet
Warm socks and Ugg boots all day every day.
5. Fuzzy socks are your number one accessory
You probably have a whole drawer full of these. They're comfy, colorful, and keep your feet warm. What more could you possibly ask for?
6. Layers are very important
Every time you go out, you wear two shirts, a sweater, a jacket, and bring another sweatshirt (just in case). You can never have too many layers, because you never know when they'll come in handy.
7. You are used to looking like a human marshmallow
8. When the AC is on, you freeze
Air conditioning: A life saver to many; but a horror to you. There is no reason for the temperature inside to ever be below 75, because who wants to wear seven layers of clothing indoors?
9. Forget about going outside in the snow
Snow is your mortal enemy. As if you weren't cold enough, the universe performs some cruel joke by sending tiny ice pellets flying at your face.
10. Or winter in general
Seasons are cool and all, but I'll just stay inside with my 500 blankets until spring.
11. It's normal for your fingertips to be slightly blue
Blue tint nail polish? No, just my abnormally cold fingertips doing their thing.
12. And your lips
At this point, it's pretty much a fashion statement. Maybe all us cold folks will start a new trend.
13. And every time you go outside, your cheeks turn bright red
No, I am not blushing. My face just does not like cold air, and the cold air does not like my face.
14. It's sweater weather until it's 60 degrees
You will never understand how people wear shorts at the first sign of spring, because you're still bundled up until mid-April.
15. Hot showers are life savers
The only struggle is deciding whether or not it's worth it to get out of your warm bed to go take one.
16. So are hot beverages
Hot beverages are not just for drinking. Sometimes it's nice to just hold something warm so for a brief instant your hands don't feel like the ice caps of Antartica.
17. And you know no matter what, you will never be warm
Just embrace it. It's who you are, and that will never change.
