15 Things English Majors Are Tired Of Hearing
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Politics and Activism

15 Things English Majors Are Tired Of Hearing

No, we don't all just sit around drinking coffee and writing poetry.

183
15 Things English Majors Are Tired Of Hearing

1. "Oh, you're an English Major? You know you're never going to get a job, right?"

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F02%2F05%2F635903132398930373-187813946_eyeroll%2520gif.gif&ho=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com&s=763&h=a0b67e4f21cfca27b4dfca930526e98abca789c0eeed5d29dba99b44fd6dc909&size=980x&c=3481634141 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F02%252F05%252F635903132398930373-187813946_eyeroll%252520gif.gif%26ho%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com%26s%3D763%26h%3Da0b67e4f21cfca27b4dfca930526e98abca789c0eeed5d29dba99b44fd6dc909%26size%3D980x%26c%3D3481634141%22%7D" expand=1]

http://giphy.com/gifs/annoyed-eye-roll-judge-judy-...

This statement really grinds my gears. If you knew anything about the English major, you would understand that a degree in English actually allows you to see from many different cultural, religious, and political perspectives which is a very strong skill to have.

2. "So you must be planning to be an English teacher then, right?"

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F02%2F06%2F635903206286555846-271399382_2nd%2520GIF.gif&ho=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com&s=486&h=5bbbe8a45d7b7bdaa57f34a79cd8035c535e07b37cd356e0f10df3eeaea2f62c&size=980x&c=1846458509 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F02%252F06%252F635903206286555846-271399382_2nd%252520GIF.gif%26ho%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com%26s%3D486%26h%3D5bbbe8a45d7b7bdaa57f34a79cd8035c535e07b37cd356e0f10df3eeaea2f62c%26size%3D980x%26c%3D1846458509%22%7D" expand=1]

http://weheartit.com/entry/45463444

No. I'm not. That's not all English majors do, you know.

3. "I thought about being an English major too once, but it just isn't realistic."

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F02%2F06%2F635903207003731645-1566554760_GIF%25203.gif&ho=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com&s=525&h=d9db1f1ee7e959db0069bd6989102a9a1bd7dc1d2ad2401a72d175bb3361ff19&size=980x&c=582034844 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F02%252F06%252F635903207003731645-1566554760_GIF%2525203.gif%26ho%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com%26s%3D525%26h%3Dd9db1f1ee7e959db0069bd6989102a9a1bd7dc1d2ad2401a72d175bb3361ff19%26size%3D980x%26c%3D582034844%22%7D" expand=1]

http://giphy.com/gifs/frustrated-gif-annoyed-trave...

You're right. Having strong writing, analytical, speaking, and critical thinking skills are such a waste of time. At least I know the difference between you're and your, unlike most people.

4. Do you even get homework?

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F02%2F06%2F635903208803172033-287512619_GIF%25204.gif&ho=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com&s=962&h=43fe0fafa6f2abf61dcb7003f31611f54e7301ebac7dd0b5053eb146b1b9e82b&size=980x&c=805465336 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F02%252F06%252F635903208803172033-287512619_GIF%2525204.gif%26ho%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com%26s%3D962%26h%3D43fe0fafa6f2abf61dcb7003f31611f54e7301ebac7dd0b5053eb146b1b9e82b%26size%3D980x%26c%3D805465336%22%7D" expand=1]

http://giphy.com/gifs/frustrated-book-throw-Z8g8D5...

Uhm, yes. I probably have double, if not triple, the amount of homework many students receive on a daily basis. I spend hours on end reading, analyzing, and writing—don't even want to hear about the twenty math problems you have to complete that will take you maybe an hour to do.

5. "So what do you even do, just read books all the time?"

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F02%2F06%2F635903209975099039-429693683_GIF%25205.gif&ho=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com&s=466&h=f6e120fbd93fba539b1b0cb4516d47ff91980bb8461467f72dc942e883eef49f&size=980x&c=2571588534 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F02%252F06%252F635903209975099039-429693683_GIF%2525205.gif%26ho%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com%26s%3D466%26h%3Df6e120fbd93fba539b1b0cb4516d47ff91980bb8461467f72dc942e883eef49f%26size%3D980x%26c%3D2571588534%22%7D" expand=1]

http://giphy.com/gifs/krysten-ritter-apt-23-dont-t...

Yes. I read all the time; however, I'm just not sitting around leisurely reading "Twilight." Try reading Beowulf in old English and then relating it to Marxist theory, then get back to me.

6. "I love to read too, I just can't seem to find the time."

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F02%2F06%2F6359032111039733591232287208_6.gif&ho=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com&s=694&h=f67017f86c48f12628f7af9e10cfe727ae5162a8b83fab9bcc70d01573c96f51&size=980x&c=2382563983 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F02%252F06%252F6359032111039733591232287208_6.gif%26ho%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com%26s%3D694%26h%3Df67017f86c48f12628f7af9e10cfe727ae5162a8b83fab9bcc70d01573c96f51%26size%3D980x%26c%3D2382563983%22%7D" expand=1]

http://giphy.com/gifs/amy-schumer-inside-3o8doSSp6...

I was just lucky enough to be born with an immense amount of free time, hence why I chose the major of English. There is absolutely nothing else I could be doing. So lucky, right?

7. "I thought about majoring in English, but I want a professional degree."

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F02%2F06%2F635903213317157146-4699338_7.gif&ho=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com&s=416&h=a711d295dfd8564b6af6adbcad112a005fdb9d6aa5b6604712661e6ccbd9cb60&size=980x&c=849335246 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F02%252F06%252F635903213317157146-4699338_7.gif%26ho%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com%26s%3D416%26h%3Da711d295dfd8564b6af6adbcad112a005fdb9d6aa5b6604712661e6ccbd9cb60%26size%3D980x%26c%3D849335246%22%7D" expand=1]

http://giphy.com/gifs/angry-nicki-minaj-frustrated...

Oh my God, I never thought about that. Looks like I'm just wasting my time as an English major. Oh right, I'm going to Law School after I graduate, never mind.

8. "My parents would literally kill me if I tried to pursue an English major."

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F02%2F06%2F635903214669103016278154179_8.gif&ho=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com&s=945&h=0a03df085ecc1368254ff036ab229b8bc8ad492a0699f863ad98a97103529e7f&size=980x&c=3373297188 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F02%252F06%252F635903214669103016278154179_8.gif%26ho%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com%26s%3D945%26h%3D0a03df085ecc1368254ff036ab229b8bc8ad492a0699f863ad98a97103529e7f%26size%3D980x%26c%3D3373297188%22%7D" expand=1]

http://www.collegetimes.com/relationships-2/23-thi...

Your parents would kill you for going to college and obtaining a degree in a very well-rounded field of study? Woah, I guess my parents just aren't as hardcore as yours are.

9. "So, like, do you understand poetry?"

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F02%2F06%2F635903216442679696-1596741372_9.gif&ho=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com&s=27&h=d3835be82b93ccf3bca8935d72bf9c0363351f199875120083e70d1d12ed3559&size=980x&c=3275034251 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F02%252F06%252F635903216442679696-1596741372_9.gif%26ho%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com%26s%3D27%26h%3Dd3835be82b93ccf3bca8935d72bf9c0363351f199875120083e70d1d12ed3559%26size%3D980x%26c%3D3275034251%22%7D" expand=1]

http://www.buzzfeed.com/erinlarosa/problems-all-pe...

No, I like totally don't even get it, care to help me figure it out?

10. "So when you write a book can I be the main character?"

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F02%2F06%2F635903217582326672-987242636_10.gif&ho=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com&s=644&h=1734d5bc89c00e3416c46c5c52b5dd6c5eb388fc7c8c6c84492238418efbcb9c&size=980x&c=276054269 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F02%252F06%252F635903217582326672-987242636_10.gif%26ho%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com%26s%3D644%26h%3D1734d5bc89c00e3416c46c5c52b5dd6c5eb388fc7c8c6c84492238418efbcb9c%26size%3D980x%26c%3D276054269%22%7D" expand=1]

http://giphy.com/gifs/please-bitch-4JcUtBL3jXiuY

Only if it's a book called, "Dumb Things the Friends of English Majors Ask Them."

11. "Your books must be so cheap."

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http://giphy.com/gifs/s7XHNosNSVMZ2

Uh, no. I actually had to buy seven books for a 100-level English class my freshman year, and that's just one class. There is nothing cheap about being an English major.

12. "So are you like some super-deep, poetry writing, feminist?"

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F02%2F06%2F635903221036554126-1553238996_12.gif&ho=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com&s=941&h=16e47a5c4a285db340baece1e09f075d73ef1cefe4965c1d75d4aa68bae404ee&size=980x&c=519882213 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F02%252F06%252F635903221036554126-1553238996_12.gif%26ho%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com%26s%3D941%26h%3D16e47a5c4a285db340baece1e09f075d73ef1cefe4965c1d75d4aa68bae404ee%26size%3D980x%26c%3D519882213%22%7D" expand=1]

http://giphy.com/gifs/eye-roll-feminism-CIYsQ5hZlY...

Oh, my God. Just stop talking, please.

13. "You must be a total grammar Nazi, right?"

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F02%2F06%2F635903222206040988920911684_13.gif&ho=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com&s=313&h=48bd7abc0d0a97bdb686c9c08e1a499fe355d6912a083334afa30582a39842d3&size=980x&c=493694129 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F02%252F06%252F635903222206040988920911684_13.gif%26ho%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com%26s%3D313%26h%3D48bd7abc0d0a97bdb686c9c08e1a499fe355d6912a083334afa30582a39842d3%26size%3D980x%26c%3D493694129%22%7D" expand=1]

http://giphy.com/gifs/reaction-mcfly-dougie-poynte...

I'd love to say that this isn't accurate, but I catch myself constantly correcting other peoples' grammar. I'm sorry, I just want you to sound educated.

14. "I hope you're prepared for a life of being broke, but don't worry, you can live in my pool house when I'm a nurse."

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F02%2F06%2F635903222943639087372348857_14.gif&ho=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com&s=965&h=18ee92ee4c98e0582293ff318317b411a87d9bffef5f06cc9ca91a6e72edcbd0&size=980x&c=4091149872 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F02%252F06%252F635903222943639087372348857_14.gif%26ho%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com%26s%3D965%26h%3D18ee92ee4c98e0582293ff318317b411a87d9bffef5f06cc9ca91a6e72edcbd0%26size%3D980x%26c%3D4091149872%22%7D" expand=1]

http://giphy.com/gifs/glee-queue-finn-hudson-MHmqu...

I'm not going to be poor. Stop assuming all English Majors are going to be poor. I'm going to Law school and will probably make more money than you. K, bye.

15. "Hey, would mind editing my paper for me?"

[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F02%2F06%2F635903224190774007-761936461_16.gif&ho=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com&s=990&h=39659791bd05aea0ed9cfd49e1db0024cf24873770271f53268609f7ca4a4752&size=980x&c=2632413791 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F02%252F06%252F635903224190774007-761936461_16.gif%26ho%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fcdn1.theodysseyonline.com%26s%3D990%26h%3D39659791bd05aea0ed9cfd49e1db0024cf24873770271f53268609f7ca4a4752%26size%3D980x%26c%3D2632413791%22%7D" expand=1]

http://giphy.com/gifs/reaction-bb17-konwlBjKPS24

Considering I'm an English major and am never going to be employed because my entire degree is a waste of my money—sorry, I can't do that.

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