1. "Yeah school is going well, my classes are pretty interesting.".
Yeah there's no way in hell college is easy, my professor spits when he talks, and failing is inevitable.
2. "I haven't really been drinking very much at school. I don't have time with all of my school work.".
The second part is true i guess, I probably shouldn't go out but I do What do you expect? A girl's gotta have some fun.
3. “I hate shots. If I had a choice I'd rather just bring some wine coolers or something.".
I actually just beat my Jello shot record last night.
4. “I have 7:30's three days a week, so I usually am in bed by like 12 LATEST.".
While normally I'm watching Netflix with my homework open… don't really know if I've done it.
5. “What am I doing this weekend? Oh probably laundry then studying for my exam next week, I'm trying to work ahead.".
No. I'm sorry but the correct answer is Netflix, Frisbee, dartys, and pong.
6. “I get up every morning to grab breakfast before class, even if that means waking up early.". e
That has as much chance as a snowball in Hell.
7. “I usually do my laundry every Sunday, just like at home.".
I am currently sitting on Mt. Everest of clothes in the corner of my room. Don't worry, I'll get to it eventually!
8. “I've probably only skipped once this semester, but it was only because I was sick and it was just a lecture.". (Has not been to this class once).
9. “Sorry about how much I've been spending, it's so difficult to save since textbooks and the food are so expensive.".
What textbooks? I still haven't gotten half of them, and I've spent 200 dollars in the past month on my chipotle habits.
10. “Yeah I'm not seeing anyone at school because I honestly just don't have enough time for it after my sorority, philanthropy, community service, and my school work. I'm just too busy!".
No one loves me. I came, I saw, I've been rejected.
11. “I probably go to the Co-Rec at least 5 times a week.".
I suppose if I walk to class today, that counts as daily cardio. Plus I heard you burn a lot of calories while sleeping. So with those two combined I should be okay!
12. “What am I doing this summer? Oh I have a couple internships lined up but I'm still trying to see what's out there.".
Who am I kidding? I'm working at Starbucks for the rest of my life..
13. “I'll call you back when I get home from the library, no I won't forget!".
Please stop calling, Facebook messaging, Emailing, Snapchatting, Instagram messaging, texting through my sister, smoke signaling, miming me from home. Please. I beg you.
14. “I can't wait to come home for summer!".
15. “I know my classes are hard but in all honesty, I know my professors are just trying to challenge me and prepare me for the real world.".
THEY ARE THE DEVIL I TELL YOU. THEY ARE ALL CONSPIRING TO FAIL ME OUT OF THIS SCHOOL.
