Let's be honest, your parents are lost without you, at least until they embrace the freedom you left them with when you moved out. In case you were curious about what goes on back home while you're busy trying to be an adult, here are the 14 stages your parents go through when you leave them.
(Side note: This list also looks a lot like the stages of recovery after a break up... Enjoy.)
1. Deny their infinite sadness.
They like to think they'll be fine without you, but reality sets in sooner or later.
2. Sit in your room and cry.
They won't admit it, but they go in there way too often to dwell on your absence and wallow in misery.
At this point, they're trying to keep it together, but they lose it randomly in casual conversation. Their friends are used to the occasional outburst of tears.
4. Watch old home videos and cry.
The crying hasn't quite died down yet, and they aren't doing much to stop it.
5. Call you repeatedly.
You put your phone on silent and walk out of class with 15 missed calls and 20 text messages from mom. Back in the day, this would mean you were in trouble. Now, it just means she misses you.
6. Worry about you.
They check your bank account hourly and develop serious anxiety wondering if you remember how to do laundry.
7. Think of things to send you.
You've gotten eight packages in the mail this week and not one of them contained food...
8. Make plans to visit you.
You get the inevitable call from home saying, "We're coming to see you this weekend!" and you're reaction is usually:
9. Make plans for you to come home.
Basically, they just want to see you any way they can, and this includes bribing you with food.
10. Stalk you on Facebook.
They check every update and tagged photo like an obsessed ex-girlfriend.
11. Sell all your stuff.
That horrible moment when you come home and find your favorite shirt missing because your parents decided to donate everything you own to Goodwill...
12. Redecorate your room.
Not only are a lot of your clothes missing, but your room looks completely different because your parents got bored and decided to rearrange the entire house...
13. Plan their next vacation.
They are finally taking advantage of their new freedom and doing all the things they've always dreamed of...
14. Party.
You're not the only one enjoying life while you're away... Even though they miss you, they've come to terms with your absence and decided that they might as well live it up while they can.
