Oh retail. It's the best of times and the worst of times. On the one hand, you meet amazing coworkers who make you laugh and are always down to get ice cream with you after closing. On the other, you are dealing with sales goals, customers who find pleasure in messing up your sale section and having to put on actual pants in order to look presentable.
Working retail is quite the adventure as those who work in this crazy fun business know too well. Here are fourteen struggles only retail workers know.
1. Greeting customers with a "How are you doing today?" to only get the cold response, "I'm just looking."
I'm sorry I do not think that is what I asked you (full sass intended). Yes, it is our job to sell you things, but it is also our job to be nice human beings. We don't want to shove clothes in your face as soon as you walk in. Assuming that all we are trying to do is make a sale is not fair to us. Sales associates need love too!
2. Seeing all your beautifully folded towers of T-shirts be ripped apart (only minutes after you refolded them).
I never thought a stack of shirts could actually break my heart.
3. Getting the same songs on your store's playlist stuck in your head, even hours after your shift is over.
If I have to listen to Meghan Trainor's "NO" one more time I swear...
4. Two words: Online. Returns.
THE PACKAGE COMES WITH A PACKING SLIP TO SEND THE CLOTHES BACK. Okay. *Deep breaths* I got that off my chest. It's not that we don't understand the jeans you ordered online don't fit. It's that we don't understand why you didn't just come in store and try them on in the first place.
#notbitter
5. Having a customer blame you personally for not having a certain size/color.
gif board via Facebook
What we have is what we have. It is really not up to us when we get shipment and how much of a specific top, pant or dress we get.
6. Dealing with older men hitting on you and you just have to smile and nod
Yes, there is pain behind this strained smile.
7. Working the dreaded "clo-pen" shift.
You all know what I am talking about. Working the closing shift then coming back the next day to work an opening shift. Closing the store is a task, but what makes it harder is when you know you will be right back there in twelve hours. Not that you don't love your co-workers shining faces, but sometimes what you need is some space (and sleep).
8. Trying to appease the customer with the incredibly specific request
"I am sorry sir, we don't have an off-baby blue quilted jacket with a half zip and a collar that has hand stitched edging."
9. Having to explain to a customer that "No, the price is not negotiable"
This is not a flea market. This is a store, with set prices. We do not choose the prices. Please do not try to argue with us.
Please.
*Whispers* please.
10. Dad jokes.
I feel bad for you Dads/Husbands out there who have been dragged to the mall to go shopping. Yet sales associates are busy grabbing sizes, cleaning out dressing rooms and checking out customers at the register. We do not have the time to laugh uncomfortably at your bad jokes about what the pair of jeans said to the scarf.
No matter how well intended they may be.
11. Getting that really mean customer who insults your outfit or size
Me: "What can I help you find today?"
Customer: "A dress for my wife!"
Me: "Fantastic! What's her size?"
Customer: "Hm, I don't know...she's way smaller than you though. So maybe a medium?"
...um, excuse me?
12. Trying to help someone who is so incredibly hot you forget how to form actual sentences
Every now and then the store is blessed with a Greek God in human form. They don't come around often, but when they do, I manage to knock over a mannequin, tell them the wrong promos and address them as 'dad'.
13."Yes, the dress was not marked with a price tag by accident. No, it is not for free."
WHY WOULD IT BE FREE? In what universe would this normally $129.00 dress be free?
14. Trying not to rip your brain out when a customer walks in two minutes before close
It's 8:58 p.m. What amount of shopping do you think you can do in two minutes?
