I have been told so many times about how rude, mean, and tough New Yorkers are. Of course whoever told me this is usually a member of the He-man-wish-you-can-be a New Yorker-but-you're-a-hater club. New Yorkers are the way we are because we have had to adjust to the city life. We've evolved and become sort of super human, and some people are just jealous of these powers. Here's a list of the 13 superpowers that only the select few (New Yorkers) possess.
1. Turnstile Transition
You can always tell if someone is from New York by the way they swipe into the train station. A New York native is able to find their metro card, swipe into the turnstile and move effortlessly in one single breath.
2. Oblivious and Unbothered
New Yorkers have developed a super external suit of unbotheredness and obliviousness. We no longer hear the sirens and the noise. We do however see the costumed characters sitting to our left, but again we just exude an immeasurable level of obliviousness to our surroundings. I mean look at the faces of the unbothered in these pictures.
3. Directions
Can anyone actually get lost in 2016 with the use of smartphones and GPS? I thought it wasn't possible, but then I realized it was just a New York thing. New Yorkers possess an incredible sense of direction thanks to the years of training in the maze of the NYC subway system.
4. Deli dialect
Super-Humans of New York even have their own secret language that only frequent deli customers know. The common greetings is "baconeggandcheese."
5. Food for super-humans
In order to sustain these super powers, New Yorkers must sustain a diet of pizza, baconeggandcheese (yes we say it as one word), coffee, bagel and street food like Halal.
6. City hater internal device
New Yorkers also possess an internal meter that activates whenever they leave NY. This meter reminds us of how much we miss home, and how much the place we are in sucks.
7. Eternal lateness
Due to geography and the domino effect, it is statistically impossible for New Yorkers to be early. Traffic and train delays will forever be the downfall of every New Yorker.
8. A lot in a little
This superpower is executed exactly how it sounds. The city can always pack a lot of things into the tiniest amount of space. We pack a whole drug store and deli in bags, pack furniture and clothes into small apartments, pack apartments on top of one another, and pack people into train cars. In fact, New York is one of the densest cities in the United States.
9. Jaywalking
It's no secret that we are all jaywalkers by nature. Breaking red lights and walking fearlessly in front of cars is a part of the daily routine.
10. Tourist Tolerance
It takes an exceptional person to put up with the daily influx of hundreds of thousands of tourists. These tourists stop abruptly to gaze at billboards and have become another task in the daily obstacle course of catching trains and avoiding crazy people.
11. Covert train filming
You know all those crazy videos you see on World Star and photos on Facebook of the NYC craziness? The person that filmed those videos had to first master the ability to go unnoticed while filming.
12. Discount detector
Due to the high cost of living here many have learned to locate and make use of every single discount and low price possible. This includes knowing the location of the nearest $1 pizza and any upcoming store sales.
13. Survival
To survive here people must put up with the high cost of living, the fast life, the crowds, the delays, and all the highs and lows of the city. It isn't easy being a New Yorker, and not everyone is cut out for it. The chosen few have developed super skills to adjust. And like they say, "If you can make it here you can make it anywhere."
Sincerely,
A proud, arrogant, New Yorker
