Indiana University of Pennsylvania President Michael Driscoll really is a great president. But as many know, he is (literally) from Alaska leaving him close to merciless when it comes to snow day cancellations.
Here are 12 things that are more likely to happen than Driscoll canceling class:
1. Steve Harvey being asked to host the Oscars.
2. Someone professing their love for Nickelback.
3. Starbucks getting rid of Pumpkin Spice Lattes.
4. Driscoll riding down Foster Hill on a dog sled…of pugs.
5. The new Humanities building flooding.
Oh wait...
6. Copper Beech going one month without being on the news.
7. The Puppy Monkey Baby handing out
beer in the library.
8. Driscoll starting a riot in the
street on IUPatty’s so he can be famous on World Star.
9. Ellen Degeneres giving the entire student body guinea pigs to keep their toes warm.
10. The squirrels in the Oak Grove plotting world domination in the vacant Leonard Hall.
11. Jimmy Stewart personally directing traffic on Philly Street.
12. Driscoll picking students up himself for class in Miss Frizzle’s Magic School Bus-Rocket and buying them all Chipotle.
Basically what I'm saying is, just get used to looking like this the rest of the winter:
Stay warm, IUP!!