I'm not gonna lie, I've been on Tinder since I was seventeen (don't tell my mom).
But in my time on Tinder, I've encountered quite the diverse group of men - actually, the good, bad, and ugly. Maybe it's just that I'm bad at swiping right, but I feel like I encounter the same people over and over again.
With that being said, here are 12 of the types of boys that you meet on Tinder, without fail:
1. The fuck-boy.
Like the vast majority of guys on Tinder, he just wants sex. He'll say how pretty and interesting you are, but over time, "Netflix & chill?" will come up in conversation and it's all downhill from there. That or they don't even have a build-up and you look at your phone just to be met with three little letters: "DTF?"
2. The kid you've matched with four times.
He was in one of your classes freshman year and you think he hooked up with one of your friends but you can't remember. But regardless, in all of your college years, you've matched four or five times. And you've ignored him four or five times. At this point, you're just swiping right for the curiosity and you know it.
3. The one who actually wants to date.
He's a rare breed and he's getting more frustrated as time goes on. He wants a "real girl" and he's decided that apparently, Tinder is the best way to go. He's in for a rude awakening.
Just because Tinder is under "Lifestyle - Dating & Relationships" on the App store, that's (generally) not the case.
4. The one you think is your prince charming - but you don't match.
You just had a ten-minute fantasy about your first date to Starbucks - what you were going to wear, him ordering your coffee for you, and you laughing while he stares at your eyes and tells you how pretty they are. But after you hit that little green heart, he's gone and "Congratulations!" doesn't pop up.. Oh well, he lost his chance, but you still spend the rest of the day checking to see if he'll still pop up later.
5. The 17-year-old you thought looked older in his first picture but he actually looks like your 13-year-old cousin in the rest of his pictures.
I don't even have the words for this one. This has had to have happened to more than just me. And honestly - it's disappointing.
6. The boy with the really bad pickup lines.
They're bad. They're obviously pulled straight off of Google but he, oddly enough, makes it work. How? We still don't know, but it does. You can't help but send him back a few corny ones you've heard over time, and eventually - he wins over your sense of humor and your phone number.
7. The fake account.
You damn well know that this prince-charming looking man that doesn't have his Instagram connected to his account is a little sketchy. His pictures are perfectly staged and he looks like he should be in one of those "Hot Guys To Follow On Insta" articles. Plus, if he's that hot, his Instagram is definitely poppin'.
Sweetheart. He's not real.
8. The guy who's matched you and all your friends.
He's matched you and all your friends but none of you have replied, and you've managed to convince yourself that you "accidentally" swiped right on him.
You damn well know you didn't, but at the end of the day, you just need this self-gratification to feel better about it.
But hey - maybe he's just a genuine guy. Probably not, but maybe.
9. The guy you made out with at a party already.
He was on frat row, right in front of the house on the corner and you know you recognize him because your face was pressed so hard against his that, despite how drunk you are, you're not going to forget. You swipe right anyway, and you match.
You never message each other because you convince yourself that he recognizes you too, and he just sits in your "Matches" section until you get bored and remake your Tinder - and the cycle continues.
10. The guy that has a kid but doesn't put it on his profile.
If you're from a small town or you go to school near a small town, this is a reoccurrence for you (or maybe it just is for me). The amount of times I've matched with a super attractive guy, only to add him on Instagram and see a slew of posts titled "Love my daughter/son", the magic just fades off.
11. The one who's "just looking for friends".
You see him every day with his girlfriend. They walk around campus holding hands but the whispers behind his back by every girl he's matched with echoes in the background behind them. But don't worry - his girlfriend knows he's "just looking for friends." I guess his girlfriend doesn't know you can delete messages on Tinder.
12. The couple.. and you know what I'm talking about.
"Looking for a third person, only swipe right if you're serious".
If this is your thing, by all means, swipe right. I won't shame you for what you're into but I, personally, would never swipe right on this guy. I don't believe that Tinder is the best place to look for your three-some buddy or sister wife or whatever you are looking for.
But hey man, good luck.
But anyway - keep swiping guys: whether it be for your 3 a.m. hookup, or your new prince charming, you can find anything on Tinder these days.
