Growing up, I never minded being the youngest one in my grade. In fact, I actually kind of liked it. I was 17 when I graduated high school, I bummed rides off of my 16-year-old friends who had their license and when everyone started getting their first job, I didn’t have to because I was too “young.” But now that I am in college, being young is starting to seriously suck. Last year was the beginning of the end of my fun. All my friends slowly started turning 21 right in front of my eyes, and now I’m the lonely 20-year-old stuck at my house, every Wednesday through Saturday night. So now that I am basically the only one in my friend group who can’t legally drink, here is what I go through on a weekly basis. And I know, somewhere out there, there is someone who shares my pain. This is to all of us under 21-year-olds. *Holds up glass of Dr. Pepper.* Cheers!
1) You don’t go out with them.
Why would I go to a bar sober just to get annoyed at drunk people and envy them because they get to have all the fun. There is nothing fun about being sober in a bar full of drunken people who are bumping into you and yelling in your ear.
2) You don’t “go out” for drinks.
My friends now do this thing where they go out for drinks on occasion. On occasion as in, like, five times a week. But guess who can’t partake in their social drinking? You guessed it, me. So naturally I still go because what else would I do other than watch Netflix? So I go, enjoy my chips and queso, and lick the salt off of their old margarita glasses.
3) You have to go home when they make their way from dinner to the bars.
“Our Uber is here,” aka, my cue to go home. Meeting up for “dinner before bars” is such a tease. We all go enjoy a nice dinner and have fun, and then all of a sudden I get booted out of the nighttime plans. There are no hard feelings, but I understand I am basically anchoring them to an alcohol-free night if I tag along.
4) Or you are forced to go to bars that the freshmen go to.
Whenever I do venture out and go to the bars, it’s the lame ones that all the freshmen go to. I seriously am going to the same bar I went to three years ago. And don’t even get me started on the guys there. I’m a year away from living an adult life and didn’t you graduate high school, like, 12 days ago?
5) You pretend you didn’t know the bar was 21 and up.
Honestly, my best pickup line is, “Oh… I didn’t know you had to be 21...” Works every time. Not. You never know unless you try, so I try, then I go home. But really, where are these signs that say I have to be 21 to step inside the bar?
6) You miss everyone’s 21st birthdays.
I couldn’t even count on my hands and toes how many of my friends’ birthdays I have missed. It’s hard to celebrate their 21st from outside of the bar.
7) AND THEN, you can’t even buy your friends alcohol or shots for their birthday.
Hope you aren’t expecting a nice bottle of wine or a shot of tequila because you aren’t getting it. Considering it is illegal to sell alcohol to someone under age, buy yourself a shot from me, then I’ll Venmo you?
8) You spend 3 Spring Breaks being under 21.
I am a junior, and this spring break I will be “turning up” everywhere but the bars. And by turning up I mean I will be indulging in virgin strawberry daiquiris.
9) You spend most summers under 21.
I will also spend the entire summer leading up to my senior year NOT celebrating my last summer as a student because #STILLNOT21. This could possibly be the most devastating thing about this coming summer. Next summer, I will have to be a grown up and I wont have a single summer to myself to sit by the pool and enjoy a margarita without being paranoid that the lifeguard is going to ID me.
10) You are usually the DD.
Sorry, I can’t DD tonight I actually have plans! (With Netflix)
11) You are usually the one they call at 3 a.m.
Sorry, I can’t come get you; I am sleeping. (With my eyes open, watching Netflix for the 8th hour in a row)
12) Everyone you know will be over 21 on your 21st birthday so you know people by the dozens will roll out.
Even though I wasn’t able to really celebrate everyone’s birthdays, you all should still come to mine. Because I have an entire year of fun I missed out on, that I have to make up for, in one night.
