Long distance relationships are hard. There are always people rooting against you, people who don't think a long distance relationship is a real relationship. However, I think a long distance relationship is one of the most valid relationships a person can have. You fall in love with a person because of their personality and who they are rather than the physical things that come with dating.
My boyfriend, Collin, and I have been dating since March although we met last September and became good friends before we ever decided to start dating. We didn't meet on a dating website. Instead, I was dropped into his Teamspeak while playing a video game. It turns out, we both loved playing video games. I didn't know what he looked like until the first time we skyped over a month later. Instead, our friendship developed from our shared interests and our personalities. I went to visit him over my spring break and we decided to start dating. We live over 600 miles apart, and with that distance come trials and tribulations, however, there are some things that you learn while being in a long distance relationship that you would never have learned otherwise.
1. Communication is important
Anyone who's ever been in an LDR will tell you this is probably the one issue that can cause things to break down. You don't see your significant other every day, so you have to be intentional in your communication. Sometimes body language is hard to read over Skype or is nonexistent over the phone. Making sure you understand each other is an important feature in any successful long distance relationship.
2. Skype becomes a staple in your life
When you're back at your house or in your dorm for the day, there's something special about being able to talk to your favorite person face-to-face. You begin to realize you take Skype for granted sometimes when you're unable to call your significant other and see their face.
3. "Date Night."
In LDRs, date night consists of queuing up Netflix and counting down, so you press the play button at the same time while you watch your favorite show or movie over Skype. There aren't any fancy dinners or mini-golf games to kick butt at. Instead, you learn to enjoy relaxing at home in your PJs (which is honestly the best anyway).
4. Planning
When you're in college and broke most of the time, planning becomes an art form. Plans to make a trip to see each other happen months in advance, so everything is booked and ready to go.
5. Talking about the future
Obviously, there's the hope that your relationship won't always be long distance, so you both tend to talk about how things will be when you finally get to close the distance.
6. Reddit
Reddit becomes one of the best places where you can find support and give advice if you happen to be in a long distance relationship. It's nice to see there are other people experiencing the same things you are. Here are some of the best subreddits to subscribe to: r/wemetonline, r/relationship_advice, and r/longdistance.
7. Saying goodbye is hard
You finally found a time that the both of you could see each other in person. You spend those days or weeks attached at the hip, soaking in each other's presence. When it comes time to get back in the car or drive away or wait at the airport to board your plane, it's the hardest thing to do knowing that it'll probably be awhile before you get to see your boyfriend or girlfriend again. The next couple of days or weeks are spent re-adjusting to only being able to Skype or text and realizing just how much you miss being right next to them.
8. But nothing beats saying hello
You tend to get butterflies in your stomach every time you go to get off your plane or pick them up at the airport, knowing they're waiting to see you again. That first hug after months of separation is the best feeling in the world.
9. You build a lot of trust
There's something to be said about the difference between being in person and being far away. In a long distance relationship, you can't keep tabs on your boyfriend or girlfriend every waking moment of your day. You have to learn to be able to trust them and trust the fact that they're with you for a reason. Trust is another one of the biggest keys to having a successful long distance relationship.
10. Irrational jealousy
I'm not going to lie when I say that I get really jealous of people who get to see my boyfriend every day. I don't have the same ability to get to do that.
11. The overwhelming sadness
There are a lot of times when you just want to cry. It's hard not being able to see your best friend every single day the way that other people are able to see theirs. There are times where I find myself sad when I go to Walmart by myself and see other couples out and about together. But, this also makes you appreciate the time you get to spend with them even more.
Having a long distance relationship is hard. But if you love who your with, the distance part doesn't matter. I wouldn't trade my relationship for anything in the world. I'd rather have the distance between us than us not be together at all.
