10 Ways To Have A Rotic Valentine's Day (Or Any Day) In College Station
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10 Ways To Have A Rotic Valentine's Day (Or Any Day) In College Station

Rotic: doing romantic things on one’s own, without the man.

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10 Ways To Have A Rotic Valentine's Day (Or Any Day) In College Station
Woe is Media

Howdy Ags. Are you single? In a long distance relationship? Have a boyfriend/girlfriend who’s out of town on Valentine’s Day?

This is for you.

It’s that time of the year again. The time where the teddy bears that hold hearts and sing obnoxious love songs fill the walls of every CVS and Walgreens near you and every Snapchat filter includes some sort of romance theme. And as we all know, College Station isn’t exactly the ideal place to keep you busy on Valentine’s Day so you won't have to dwell in isolated loneliness. But have no fear. I am typing this today to tell you that there are multiple ways to make Valentine's Day the best holiday of the year -- all by yourself.

1. Dinner at Café Excel

Make a reservation for yourself at Café Excel. Do your hair, cake on that makeup, and dress up super cute. Don’t forget those stilettos baby cake. Take a limo to the restaurant. Hire paparazzi to make you feel like a celebrity upon your arrival. Once inside the restaurant, make sure you get seated at a table in the middle of the entire place. Ask the waiter for a cup of water and 3000 straws. Make as many spitballs from the straws as possible and shoot them at every couple around you.

2. Puppy Station

Drive to puppy station. Make sure you’ve cleaned your car out ahead of time so there’s lots of space. Go inside puppy station. Give the girl working all of your quarters, run to the back, stuff all 18 puppies into your extra large sweatshirt, and run. Put the puppies inside your car and drive away. Now you officially have 18 boyfriends instead of just 1.

3. Bahama Bucks

All I’m saying is they will sell you 2 dozen snowballs for $8.99. You’re welcome.

4. Sugar Loaf Mountain

It’s time for a spontaneous adventure with your love (aka yourself). Blindfold yourself, and drive to Sugar Loaf Mountain (I promise this is safe, you don’t need your eyes to see the road it’s totally fine). Hike up to the top of the mountain, holding your own hand. Next, take an adorable picture of yourself with the view. Drive back home and crop your celebrity crush into the picture. Post it on Instagram with the caption “Valentine’s Day with my ‘Sugar’” because Sugar Loaf, get it?


5. Spirit Ice Arena

Take yourself to the ice skating rink. Once you’re in, don’t rent skates. First, go find where the music is playing. Pull up your “Break Up Songs” playlist on Spotify and play that baby on full blast. Next step-- go find that zamboni. Climb into the zamboni and drive it onto the ice. Make every couple in sight your target, and run them off the rink. It’ll be epic.


6. Research Park

Find the biggest oak tree in Research Park. Carve a heart into the tree and put just your own initials inside of it.

7. Gumby’s

TREAT YO SELF. Chocolate on Valentine’s Day is way too cliché anyways.

8. Lake Bryan

Arrive at Lake Bryan. Walk around the lake people watching all the couples hammocking, grilling food, etc. Walk up to them and ask if they’d like their picture taken (every couple is going to say yes because what couple doesn’t post a picture of themselves on Valentine’s Day am I right?!?!) Use random inanimate objects, like a banana or a rock, to pretend to take their picture. Once you pretend to take their picture, loudly yell “IT’S NOT A CAMERA” and run away laughing!!!! End your lovely evening here at Lake Bryan by watching the glorious sunset on the lake, alone.

9. Harry’s

Go two-stepping at Harry’s and dance by yourself the whole time, pretending to be dancing with someone else. You can spin yourself around the floor all you want and never have to worry about the person you’re dancing with accidentally stepping on your feet because you won’t be dancing with anyone. It’s genius.

10. Miscellaneous

Do whatever the heck you want!!! You could go to Wal-Mart and buy plates to smash or you could go mattress sliding down the stairs in your apartment or even just have a chill night at home laughing your butt off to the movie "Crazy Stupid Love."

I hope these ideas inspire you to make the most out of every Febraury 14th that ever comes your way in the wonderful College Station, TX.

Peace and blessings.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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