With fall fast approaching, a whole new start of wedding season is upon us. Whether you've been to 100 weddings or this is your first, here are just a few ways you can be certain you won't be invited to another. If you want the happy couple to remember you for all of the right reasons, do the exact opposite of these. Here we go.
1. Wear the nicest, white dress that you can find.
In fact, why stop with it just being white? Bonus points if you find one that's also long, sparkly and may or may not resemble a wedding dress. You'll look great, and I'm sure the bride won't even care. Twinsies, am I right?
2. Pregame that sucker like you're reliving your best college days.
If you're going to a wedding, you should definitely get drunk before you even arrive. The Bride and Groom are probably worried it won't be any fun, and are hoping you'll arrive ready to party. In fact, they'll probably appreciate your added enthusiasm at their union of love. So yeah, definitely take that one last shot.
3. Answer your phone during the ceremony.
You know when someone answers their phone during a movie, and the entire audience turns around to look at them because it's so insanely rude? This is nothing like that, and you should 100 percent do it. It's not like you can just let whoever that is go to voicemail, that would be ridiculous.
4. Wing that wedding speech.
Practice certainly doesn't make perfect. Especially in this case, whatever comes to your mind is what you should say. Remember those shots you took before you got there? They're gonna help with the whole creative thing.
5. Order pizza because you don't like the food choices.
The steak, seafood and chicken options just don't sound that good to you. Good thing you have Papa John's on speed dial. Just tell them to text you when they get there, so it's not too obvious.
6. Get aggressive with that bouquet toss, girl.
If you don't get in there and really show the bride you care, she'll def be offended. Knocking over a few bridesmaids in the process will make her even happier. And hello? Once you catch the bouquet, your boyfriend basically has to to make the next move. Which leads me to next my point.
7. Propose or be proposed to.
If you think that proposing at a wedding is the perfect time because all of your friends are there anyway - you're right! Use that time to take the attention away from the bride and groom. Yeah, it's their day... but now it's yours, too. So, win-win.
8. Get a little too crazy on the dance floor.
If the words "twerk," "grind" or "strip" are listed under the skills section on your resume, then for sure get yourself out on that dance floor. Give the people what they're obviously wanting, and make sure the happy couple will remember that night for the rest of their life.
9. Demand drinks from the bar once they've cut you off.
Having a few drinks at the bar even though you don't need them isn't that big of a deal. You should probably make a scene, throw a tantrum or something like that to make sure the bartender understands that you're "fine" and just need one more.
10. Tell the bride and groom what you would have done differently.
You have 1,000 pins on your "One Day <3" wedding Pinterest board, so clearly you know your stuff. You should do your part by informing the bride and groom of your favorite parts, what you'd do differently and maybe even what ideas you'll end up stealing for your own.
