10 Times Amy Poehler Described Your Blind Date | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Entertainment

10 Times Amy Poehler Described Your Blind Date

I have a friend of a friend that you have to meet!

Rachel Payne
Sep 07, 2015
University of Cincinnati
37
10 Times Amy Poehler Described Your Blind Date

"I found this great guy that I think would be perfect for you!"

This isn't the first time that you have heard this.. Gotta keep your hopes up. Maybe, dating isn't such a bad thing? It can't hurt... Hopefully you'll at least get a fancier meal than your microwave dinners, right?


1. You arrive at the restaurant and it's time to just tell yourself on repeat...


2. "What are your hobbies? What do you like to do for fun?"

You probably should tell the truth, but that might scare him away. Casually smile and say, "I love to work out, and watch movies with my friends."



3. Wow! They already ordered for me! I love someone that can take control. Wait, what, is this a salad?

I am sorry, but I am not a rabbit, and I do not wish to eat plants. Where's my steak? Maybe, I don't want someone to take control.


4. Aw, they want to feed me. How cute!

Isn't this supposed to be like one of those romantic comedies? No, it's awkward and they missed my mouth. They can stop trying anytime now.


5. "Are you looking for something serious? Do you want kids? What are your thoughts on marriage?"

You can't handle this right now. This a first date. You're just gonna smile and laugh like this is a joke.



6. "I'm just ready to fall in love with someone, right now."

Can it get worse? Is it ever going to stop? You're ready to eat a large meal by yourself, right now. That is what love is.



7. It's almost dessert time, here we go. Nope, they are now saying that they want the check. Hello, you are not done yet.

First, you have to eat like a rabbit, and now you are getting restricted from your favorite part of the menu. This is not going as planned.



8. Their car smells like a mix of a dirty gym bag, and month old rotten garbage.

Why didn't you order an Uber? OK, just roll down a window. Nope, window is broken and is not going down.

9. "I had a great night. Thanks!"

Exit the car as quickly as possible. You sprint to the door, phew, who knew you were a track star? Wait, the car is still here... and so are they.



10. They lean in for a hug, a kiss, or some form of physical contact.

Nice try, but there is no way. Here you go into the friend zone.


Maybe, next time.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Featured

AI music threatens creativity

The Soul of Sound: How AI Challenges Human Expression in Music

395270
Humans and robots face off in a rock band battle with guitars and drums, under dynamic lighting.
StableDiffusion

In an age where artificial intelligence can mimic the voice of Freddie Mercury or reimagine pop hits as synthwave ballads, a new frontier has emerged — one that blurs the line between innovation and erosion. While AI offers undeniable benefits in technical domains, its intrusion into creative arts, especially music, raises urgent questions. Not just about copyright, but about culture, education, and the very soul of artistic expression.


Keep Reading...Show less
ai generated music
Entertainment

Every Girl Needs To Listen To 'She Used To Be Mine' By Sara Bareilles

These powerful lyrics remind us how much good is inside each of us and that sometimes we are too blinded by our imperfections to see the other side of the coin, to see all of that good.

Miami University
733932
Every Girl Needs To Listen To 'She Used To Be Mine' By Sara Bareilles

The song was sent to me late in the middle of the night. I was still awake enough to plug in my headphones and listen to it immediately. I always did this when my best friend sent me songs, never wasting a moment. She had sent a message with this one too, telling me it reminded her so much of both of us and what we have each been through in the past couple of months.

Keep Reading...Show less
music
Entertainment

Why Your Astrological Sign May Not Match Your Personality

We are all more than just one sign.

SUNY Plattsburgh
650045
Zodiac wheel with signs and symbols surrounding a central sun against a starry sky.

What's your sign? It's one of the first questions some of us are asked when approached by someone in a bar, at a party or even when having lunch with some of our friends. Astrology, for centuries, has been one of the largest phenomenons out there. There's a reason why many magazines and newspapers have a horoscope page, and there's also a reason why almost every bookstore or library has a section dedicated completely to astrology. Many of us could just be curious about why some of us act differently than others and whom we will get along with best, and others may just want to see if their sign does, in fact, match their personality.

Keep Reading...Show less
astrology
Entertainment

20 Song Lyrics To Put A Spring Into Your Instagram Captions

"On an island in the sun, We'll be playing and having fun"

UNC Greensboro
635749
Person in front of neon musical instruments; glowing red and white lights.
Photo by Spencer Imbrock on Unsplash

Whenever I post a picture to Instagram, it takes me so long to come up with a caption. I want to be funny, clever, cute and direct all at the same time. It can be frustrating! So I just look for some online. I really like to find a song lyric that goes with my picture, I just feel like it gives the picture a certain vibe.

Here's a list of song lyrics that can go with any picture you want to post!

Keep Reading...Show less
spring
Relationships

The Importance Of Being A Good Person

An open letter to the good-hearted people.

Sacred Heart University
929482
Chalk drawing of scales weighing "good" and "bad" on a blackboard.
WP content

Being a good person does not depend on your religion or status in life, your race or skin color, political views or culture. It depends on how good you treat others.

We are all born to do something great. Whether that be to grow up and become a doctor and save the lives of thousands of people, run a marathon, win the Noble Peace Prize, or be the greatest mother or father for your own future children one day. Regardless, we are all born with a purpose. But in between birth and death lies a path that life paves for us; a path that we must fill with something that gives our lives meaning.

Keep Reading...Show less
good person

Trending Topics

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments