Before I Date
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Student Life

Before I Date

Learning to run at my own pace, attentive to the free terrain that single-hood offers.

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Before I Date
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This week, I've been scrolling by a lot of articles and posts on Facebook that are centered around dating and significant others... But honestly? Here's the thought-reel that runs through my mind when I see posts like that: I'm 23, here's what I want to do, I'm still ridiculously young, I have a lot of great people in my life and friendship is important. Real Talk: If I date, will that slow me down? ...The answer to that question comes into focus quickly and I don't click.

I think women and men need to be running at their own paces, remaining focused on the finish line, attentive to the terrain ahead. If two individuals are running at the same pace, that's awesome! Go for it, try, run together, and if it works out, cool… But I think it's important to not lose sight of the individual journey it takes to get to the finish, and what fun it can be to run at your pace with friends and people God has put in your life before someone comes along and says they want to date you. We all have dreams and goals we want to accomplish and I believe it's healthy to run after those things before dating because it helps us understand ourselves and what we're capable of doing before adding another person into the mix.

I came up with a list of ten things that I’d like to do before - or be in the midst of doing - when someone takes pace alongside me. Some of these things are silly. A good portion of my list is filled with serious things I want to do or try my hand at. So without further adieu and in no particular order, before I date, I want to:

Run a Half-Marathon

I’ve recently been contemplating doing a Half-Marathon in 2017 with some friends in Georgia and I still have time to decide whether or not to sign up. Stay tuned for more! I want to run a Half with the intention of running a Full somewhere along the line. I know I'm capable of achieving whatever I put my mind to, though, and that's what's important here.

Live in Community

I can’t picture my life without it. I want room mates. I want to sit at the table and gather together, challenge one another, and just do life in grace, love, and hope that the Lord offers. I want to stick through the things that come in the territory of living with a good group of girls, because really? At the end of the day, community is worth fighting for.

Travel to Europe, Australia, New Zealand; AND Africa AND Cambodia again

I thought leaving for a year would cure me of my wanderlust. It just created more of a dreamer and desire to wander the earth with Jesus in me. Whether I like to admit it or not, I did fall in love with Africa. I'd honestly head back there in a heartbeat if I had the chance. I think about Cambodia nearly every day and if we're being honest, I have at least one dream involving Siem Reap every month. Why not go back one day? And among the list of places I always wanted to travel as a kid, Europe, Australia, and New Zealand were always on that list… I'm already saving my pennies just thinking about it!

Be in the Process of Writing a Book

Among all the dreams I have, writing — a book to be published and printed — is on top of my list right now.

Learn a Song on Guitar and Play it in a Coffee Shop Setting

I loved guitar as a kid. I gave it up because I believed it to be too hard. I picked up the instrument while I was gone and fell in love again. Playing decently in front of a crowd in a city Coffee Shop setting has always been a dream of mine, so why not try?

Apply for the Reality Show “Survivor” just for Kicks and Giggles

“Survivor” was and still is the show my family and I gather together to watch. I’ve only missed a few seasons over the years, but I’ve always wondered what it would be like to play the game. I know that the odds of actually getting on are pretty hard, but for kicks and giggles, how fun would it be to apply online, make a silly video, and see where it goes?

Pay a Good Portion of my Student Loans Off

I want to be as free of my college debt as possible. Enough said. When I get a full-time job soon, it’s going to require frugality, contentment to remain planted where I am, and overpaying the monthly amount as much as I possibly can. But to be free of that debt sooner rather than later is one of my primary goals right now.

Work for a Christian Non-Profit I can get behind the mission of

My heart is for people, getting to know them, and specifically listening to their stories and hearts. Nothing gives me greater joy than meeting people exactly where they are at. Working for a non-profit would help me do what I love with a sense of purpose beyond what a normal nine to five could give me.

Trip and Fall in more Classy Places

When I’m relaxed, I trip and fall ALL the time and it’s hilarious. I have an entire falling-chronicle piece from my time abroad. Plus, falling always reminds me to smile, laugh at myself, and get back up and try again.

Get into Photography

I know I have a unique way of seeing things. I can definitely express that through writing, but I’d love to explore a new avenue of art aside from the normal write-and-draw. I love making artsy Instagram photos with my phone and I’ve always wondered what it would be like to go out and take pictures with a big fancy camera in order to see life, love, and people through a new lens.

It all sounds really dreamy and fun, right? You may have even forgotten while you were reading that these are things I ideally want to be in the midst of doing before I begin dating. But that’s the point. Life before — and even after — dating should not be a drag. It should be our best days.

I want to be excited about the life I am building when someone else decides to join me. I don't want the introduction of a possible life partner to be the beginning of the adventure, though. Because it's not. The adventure is already in full-swing right now. I'm praying that the prize at the end and the journey it takes to get there shines so bright I can't keep my eyes off of it. I'm praying that whoever it is that joins me will also feel the same about the prize and the journey.

What does your individual and beautiful path look like? What do you want to do before you date? If you're dating already, what does it look like to live life healthy as an individual person while respecting, honoring, and running alongside the person you're dating?

The prize at the end is worth more than gold. Running at my own pace and actively waiting for the right person to join has been entirely worth it. And I refuse to slow down.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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