Ahhh, science. Th center of life on Earth. The reason we walk this very planet. The reason for having an asphalt-roof over our heads and a meal made of photosynthetic plants and chunks of cooked muscle on our plates. For some people, science is everything (and whether you like it or not, it literally is everything). If you're passionate enough about theories and hypotheses and every other science-y thing, you probably decided that you may just want it to be your focus in college. Whether your path takes you towards physics, biology, chemistry, or something in between, us science majors have a lot in common. These are just 10 out of a million things that all science majors can relate to:
1. Knowing the Lab Safety Protocol like the back of your rubber nitrile gloved-hand.
After years of taking the same safety quiz and reading the same manuals, I think it's safe to say that I understand I shouldn't drink the hazardous chemicals or ingest the enzymatic catalysts. I won't rub my eyes with my iodine-stained gloves and I won't stick my fingers in the centrifuge.
2. There's that one class that you know you need to take, but dread it.
No matter how much you love science, it's definitely hard to love all of it. This class is probably an intro level class that is a required prerequisite to the rest of the entire science department, but something about that subject just makes you cringe. For a biology major, the idea of general chemistry may make them shudder. For a chemistry major, that class may be physics (i.e. me). But in the end, you gotta do what you gotta do.
3. The idea of graduating in 4 years seems impossible.
From all the prerequisites and general level courses in each science department, to the higher level courses that get more and more specific as you dive deeper into your major, to trying to fit in what seems like eight different labs in the five-day week, we've all had those moments where we'd feel lucky to get out of undergraduate college by the time we're old enough to run for President of the United States.
4. The constant fear of breaking something in the lab.
It's always super reassuring when your lab professor lets you know that breaking that super expensive piece of equipment would cost you enough to put you in eternal debt. Whether it's the highly-advanced gas chromatograph, the latest version of the Vernier LabQuest, or the extremely delicate micropipette, you're more than careful to make sure you won't end up paying a tuition's worth of broken-equipment fees.
5. The tedious process of writing down the exact make and model of each and every piece of equipment used.
This is in order for each lab report to be "reproducible." Each piece of glassware, each version of computer software, each digital balance, heck, even the type of plastic pipette tips. At this point I practically mutter "Fisher Scientific™ Hotplate Stirrer" in my sleep.
6. Realizing half way through the lab that you missed a step.
Nothing is more frustrating than realizing you forgot to weigh the clean beaker/flask/watch glass before you started the experiment so you can subtract its mass afterwards, or running the entire test on distance vs. time without clicking "Start Data Collection."
7. Looking through scribbled lab notes trying to figure out which number is which.
Writing a lab report days after doing the actual lab can be extremely frustrating, especially when you were in too much of a rush to jot everything down. Does this number go to the temperature before or after the incubation period? Is this "41.78" a mass, temperature, or time? I think it's the mass...but, the mass of what...?
8.The temptation to tweak your data to make your results seem better.
Okay yes, something probably went wrong if our solution started boiling at 52 degrees when the actual boiling point is 84 degrees. But maybe if we just change the "5" to an "8"...yeah that should be okay...
9. Learning how to state "I f***ed up" in a formal lab report.
As much as we'd love to say that and leave it at that, they are formal reports after all. After my fair share of formal lab write-ups, I've learned that there are countless ways to document your failures in truly eloquent and sophisticated ways (the secret to an intelligent-sounding report is a thesaurus. Synonyms are key). I may have royally messed up, but at least I sound smart!
And finally,
10. Goggle marks.
I might as well have them tattooed on my face at this point.
But as many struggles that comes with being a science major, I wouldn't want to spend my college years doing anything else.
