To survive college you need help. Not just with school work and job hunting but you need help on a molecular level just to get your body moving. This is when the good Lord blessed you with the sweet rich aroma of coffee. Kafe, kava, cafe, ga feh, kafo, kape, qava, kafo, or buna; so many names for this life-changing liquid. Whether you were a coffee-drinking fiend before you came to college or you took your first sip during dead week the outcome is the same. By the time we all grab onto that degree with one hand you bet there is a coffee cup in the other.
1. When you haven’t had coffee in three days and you feel every cell in your body dying.
We have all felt this and it is a feeling I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. Imagine staying awake for 10 days while being forced to do quantum physics in a room full of harsh florescent light and that gives you an idea.
2. When all the baristas know your name, your usual, and basically your entire family history.
Now when you find that perfect place to sit and enjoy that rich cup of wonderfulness, you want to stay! You get to know the people around you and let me tell you, no one regretted being friends with a really good barista.
3. When the majority of your snapchats feature a coffee cup, a mug, or the remanence of the life-sustaining liquid.
It’s only natural that you would want to showcase your one true love and for the amount of money you spend on that coffee you might as well showcase your joy.
4. You have at least three coffee cups in your car this very moment.
Coffee gives you energy, energy gets you moving, and moving means you’re on the go. Having a family-sized collection of coffee cups in your car is nothing to be ashamed of, it’s further proof that you are a go getter!
5. You go through punch cards or ring up membership points like every week is finals week.
I just told you that I need coffee to move so this should be self-explanatory.
6. You are your friend's go-to coffee partner and expert.
You’ve been around the block a few times so you know which shops have the better muffins and which ones to not go to during certain hours of the day. Basically you could fill out an Excel spreadsheet with your knowledge and your friends are highly aware of this.
7. Your friends know your mood based on what kind of coffee you get or if you’ve had any at all.
Some of us display our emotions on our faces, some of us use our words, and a select few express it through our coffee. You can bet that a black coffee day with two sugars is not a fun day for me and it's best to just leave me be.
8. You get asked, “Do you go there every day?,” a lot, and you lie...
Your friends and classmates literally see you with a cup in your hand every day, yet you still chose denial. It’s OK at least this addiction is socially acceptable.
9. You have to carve out a substantial chunk of your budget strictly for coffee use.
Nothing good comes for free my friends…
10. If you had to pick between a relationship and coffee for the rest of your life you're pretty sure coffee would win...
Don't get me wrong, I'm sure you would think long and hard about it, but in the end you know what the right choice would be. Coffee has always been there for you and it will never let you down.
11. The greatest gift anyone can ever get you is coffee and you’re dead serious about it.
Only your real friends know that you are a person of simplicity and all that you really need is coffee.
