Nothing is worse than when you start to have feeling for a guy only for him to turn into a disappointment when he shows you his true colors: that he's actually a fuckboy. So here are 10 ways that in my years of dating and hating fuckboys I've found to identify a fuckboy before you get in too deep.
1. His compliments are always about your body.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m a sucker for a guy calling me beautiful and telling me everything he loves about my body, but if he never compliments your mind, or your determination, or your kindness, he doesn’t see you as a person, he sees you as a mix of body parts he finds attractive and someone he’d like to have sex with, that’s it.
2. He only ever calls you generic pet names.
Don't get me wrong, I love pet names as much as the next girl, but when all he ever calls you is honey even though he knows your favorite pet name is baby girl and you hate being called honey because it sounds demeaning, he's not trying to be cute anymore, he's trying not to mix you up with the other girls he's talking to.
3. He flirts with other girls in front of you or flirts with you when he has a girlfriend.
This guy doesn’t care about his relationships, and he doesn’t care that you know it. He’s constantly looking for the next best thing and doesn’t care that you know he’s looking for something else. You can’t trust this guy and he doesn’t care if you do.
4. He doesn’t care about your interests.
Sometimes you will date people who don’t share your interests. I’m super into horses, I plan on being an equine vet, but most people aren’t into horses. But I’ve had significant others who would let me talk their ears off about horses and significant others who would stop me when the conversation came up because they didn’t care. The latter were the fuckboys. If you care about something, they should care about it, even a little bit. They don’t have to be as crazy about it as you, but they should show some interest in it because it’s something that makes you happy.
5. He never puts pictures of you on social media.
You've put him on every piece of social media you have at least once, but he refuses to even think about putting a picture of you on his story. He says it's because he doesn't want other guys looking at you, but it's probably because he doesn't want the other girls he's hitting on seeing his girlfriend.
6. He refuses to compromise.
You want to go do something, he just wants to hang out at one of your houses. The ideal solution is do something and then go chill, but you end up spending the whole day at his house watching him play GTA. It doesn’t matter what you want to do, you’ll always end up doing what he wants because you’d rather spend time together than fight and he knows if he waits long enough he’ll wear you out. This guy doesn’t want you to be happy, he wants you to be happy on his terms.
7. He refuses to commit.
Commitment is important. You don’t have to become exclusive on the first date but after a while, there should be a commitment made. If every time and any time you mention becoming exclusive he shrinks away from the question, then he’s trying to keep himself from feeling guilty when he sees other people behind your back.
8. He doesn't want to meet your friends and family or doesn't want you to meet his friends and family.
When he doesn’t want to meet your friends and family, that shows he doesn’t care about the people that are important to you, and when he won’t let you meet his friends and family that shows he doesn’t care if the people important to him know you. Either way, he doesn’t plan on you being in his life very long if he won’t let you guys meet the important people in the other’s life.
9. He uses words he has no right to use.
I'm talking about white guys who use the n word, or straight guys that say f*ggot, or any other guys that use slurs of groups they aren't a part of. These are words that have a history behind them, a history where he represents the bad guy. The fact that he uses these words anyway shows that he doesn't respect the history behind these words and doesn't understand.
10. He doesn't respect your no.
Obviously, this applies to guys who ask you out over and over again even after you say no once, but it also applies to the guys who try to push you into doing something you don't want to do. You say I don't want you to be all over me at work, he still tries to kiss you in front of your boss. You say I'm not sure I want to spend the night at your house this weekend, he says if you don't he'll break up with you. He'll say it was a joke later, but still, this is him not caring what makes you comfortable versus what he wants.
If the boy you’re interested in has done any or all of these things, congratulations, he might be a fuckboy! Use these to go forward and waste less time on boys who won’t screw you over and play with your heart. If any of those exist.
