Adrenaline fills your veins and tears flood from your eyes. You're ready to come out to your friends and family. Well, as ready as you'll ever be, right? Maybe you're in love and feel as if the person you feel so strongly about doesn't deserve to be a secret to the people in your life. Maybe you are sick of pretending to be someone that you aren't. Whatever the reason, you have decided that this is the time for them to hear what you've been waiting so long to say.
A list of possible outcomes run through your mind. You expect what you assume would be the worst. Perhaps yelling and screaming, or sobbing will occur, leaving you standing there wishing you hadn't said anything at all. Yet, with a burst of courage, you tell them anyway.
You tell your family that you are a member of the LGBTQA+ community and you tell them that you needed to let them in on a big part of who you actually are in order to be happy.
Instead of the anger that you expected, you are met with disappointment and reservation. This person that means so much to you stands in front of you and tells you that if that's what you think you are, they would appreciate if you would keep it a secret until they are comfortable with it.
Anger floods your veins, your face turns a deep hot red, and your stomach churns uncontrollably. This is because you've been uncomfortable for years and years. Due to the society that we live in, you've had to fear who you are and what people may think. You've feared for your safety and for lack of acceptance. You've heard that it is an awful "choice" or if it isn't a choice, you must be the epitome of a genetic mistake. You've worked so damn hard to conquer these remarks, these standards, these terrible misconceptions. You've realized that who you are, who you love, what you feel, socially constructed gender, or your sexuality doesn't make you less of a person.
But, here you are, standing there and feeling like you should have kept the secret a little longer because the person you love says so. But I am here to tell you that you are not wrong to be proud of who you are. Because we live in a culture and society founded on certain ideology, we are met with confusion when we skew what they think is "normal". But their confusion does not define who you are. You are the same person you were before you came out and you deserve to be accepted. You are normal and you are extraordinary.
The qualities of friendship and family require acceptance and unconditional love. If your love is met with conditions, that is no fault of your own. Rather, they are breaking what it means to be family or have a friendship.
Be who you are and love who you love because life is so short and if we live for other people, we will look back with regret and realize we've wasted so much time being someone that we aren't. Stay strong, you're not alone.
