I scratch your back, you scratch mine they always say, right? For the past couple of months God has really challenged me in my thinking about giving and receiving. I know it is a natural response to want to bless those that continually are a blessing to us. But, isn't that kind of conditional? Essentially we are saying, as long as you have my best interest in mind, I will have yours. This is a wrong way of thinking. If we can only bless those who give to us, then there is an ugly selfish monster growing inside, trying to destroy our love walks.
One of my love languages, or ways that I receive and feel love, is gifts. Not everyone has the same love languages, so gifts may not mean that much to you. For me, it's a big deal. Because of that, I can sometimes entertain wrong thinking patterns about giving and receiving. "I went out of my way to buy this person a gift to show them I appreciate them and they never did that for me." If I think this way, that means my giving was conditional in the first place, which is wrong. This means I gave to hopefully have the favor returned, because that's just how it works, right? Unfortunately, that isn't how it always works. Truly, it seems unfortunate in the moment but really it is not. It is wonderful to give without condition and find joy in meeting others needs maybe even sometimes before your own needs. There is true joy in giving with that kind of attitude.
Whatever it may be; giving to your church, a family in need, a birthday gift, or anything else, giving with the right intent is what makes it a worth while and loving gift. Although it is so wonderful to receive gifts and so much love can be felt from them, it is truly better to give with no restraint. "But, I don't have anything to give..." Give anyways. "But I can't even buy what I want if I give to others." Give anyways. I promise you no one will ever look back on your life and say, "Oh, he/she was so great. And, boy, did he/she receive a lot of gifts and have a bunch of stuff." No. People will remember you for how much you gave. How many times you took care of someone else's needs above your own, or how you went out of your way to buy something for a loved one that you wouldn't even buy for yourself.
If no one ever returns the favor, you can rest assured knowing that your daddy God owns all the cattle on a thousand hills and you will be provided for. If you can recognize that your heavenly Father is your provider and that He owns it all, you will be able to release whatever it is that is in your hand to whom ever that is in need. If Daddy put it in your hand once, He can do it again.
If this is hard for you to take a hold of, try declaring this quietly to yourself every time you give to someone, "I am blessed to be a blessing; you owe me nothing." I've been trying to say this as much as possible in these types of situations and it really has been liberating. It takes that person off the hook of "owing you". And, it allows you to TRULY be a blessing and give without restraint and without condition. Giving and thinking this way will enhance your love walk and free you from future offense. Jesus paid the highest price. A debt I could never repay. The ultimate sign of love was the fact that He knew we could never repay Him and He did it anyway. So, whenever you give, give without restraint.
