80% of 10-year-old girls have been on a diet at least once. 42% percent of first, second and third grade girls still want to lose weight. At least 12% of teen boys are known for using unproven supplements and/or steroids. Just a few days ago, I saw a story on the news of a beautiful five year old girl that spoke of how she wanted to diet in order to look thinner. One personal goal I have recently acquired has been to never approach any youngster by telling them how darn “cute/handsome/pretty/well-dressed” they are. Those words and phrases have slowly developed into a way to break the ice with children, but by starting our first conversations with adjectives dealing with appearance, we suggest that the first and most important thing noticed is the outward show.

As much as I want to go up to a little girl and mention how adorable she looks in her light blue dress and her pigtails, I stop myself. We have heard many times that it is easier to shape young minds than old; therefore, we must begin to create true meaningful conversations. Speak of their passions, ideas, and abilities because the beauty of a boy or girl’s mind and personality has been under credited. Whether it is about an eight year old girl’s favorite book character, or you talk to a twelve year old boy about his aspiration to play drums for the Memorial Day parade in town, we should actually use our words to not only learn more about a child’s inner self, but we are able to truly motivate them. Instead of noticing a person’s appearance first, it should be a goal to recognize the mind and what drives it.

I strive to ask the middle school boy I meet about his thoughts on the latest news and how he felt about his classes in school, rather than feeling awkward during the first greeting and randomly mentioning how he seems to be getting muscular. When I see one of my ten year old sister’s friends, I will ask them what book they are reading for the school program instead of how her new summer outfit looks pretty. By asking about a child’s likes and dislikes, it seems to generate a much more intelligent conversation; furthermore, a person should never feel as if his/her appearance is the first thing that will be noticed because it is definitely not what should matter the most.

The statistics I found on children needing to restrict their eating and take drugs to change how one looks is appalling, but I believe that by changing how we speak to each other can show that there is much much more to anyone than just what is on the outside. She is beautiful for the way she thinks, for the way she loves, and for her ability to make other people smile. He is handsome and strong for the way he dreams, for the way he is motivated, and for the way that he is able to learn and be inspired by life every day.