Yes (Wo)Man: Why I Just Can’t Say “No”

Yes (Wo)Man: Why I Just Can’t Say “No”

There is a difference between a people pleaser and a genuinely nice person, and I often dance around the line of those two…

If Jim Carrey wanted to make a sequel to his movie "Yes Man", I would play the lead role. Except it would be called, Yes Woman and would feature the crazy situations I get myself into on a daily basis.

If you live under a rock and have never seen "Yes Man", it’s basically a Rom-Com where a man (Jim Carrey) is tired of his negative ways and goes to a seminar where he begins to start saying “Yes!” to every question he encounters during his day.

So maybe I’m not as bad as "Yes Man" if you asked me to go to CrossFit at 5 am tomorrow morning, that would be a hard, fast NO! But I really do have a difficult time telling people “no” and I get myself into some interesting situations because of it.

It’s not that I feel pressured or wish to always fit in, I just genuinely like to make people happy because it makes me happy, so in return, YES comes out of my mouth a lot.

My schedule is already busy enough- I go to school full time, work two jobs, fit a date or two in with my boyfriend each week and try to maintain some sort of a social life. My puppy also wants me to become a stay at home dog mom, so that is in the works as well. You get the point, I’m a busy girl and don’t have a lot of free time, which is why saying yes sometimes gets me in a pinch.

I have come to the realization that something needs to give, but is it necessarily a bad thing that I always want to say yes?

I try to be a happy, positive, person and I feel like saying yes goes along with that. So what if I am slammed with homework and work this week but my best friend’s club at school is having a fundraiser and they need me to eat dinner at Chipotle on Tuesday?

Ok, sure I can do that! I made a new friend at school yesterday and she needs me to watch her 6-week-old puppy for the rest of the week, should be easy, right?

Sarah’s birthday is Thursday and I should really bake her a B-day cake because I know she loves them. The lady I babysit for wants me to make a homemade Halloween costume for her little girl- coming right up! My coworker really needs me to work her shift on Friday, and a friend of a friend needs me to do 8 wedding hair up-dos next weekend, why not? It’s a never-ending cycle.

I am not complaining, I love what I do and the people in my life and I hope I can positively impact as many as I can. But at what point will I be ok with saying “no?” It worries me sometimes that at some point I am letting other people control my life to the point of getting run down.

On the flip side, I am a caretaker, I like to see people happy and I find joy in seeing them smile. If I am doing what I love, it doesn’t really matter at the end of the day, right?!

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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Why Getting Away From Where You Grew Up Is Important

College is the perfect time to get away from home and go out into the real world.

As you get older, life sometimes makes it hard for you to take control and go to the places you've only dreamed of. There's always a work meeting, ballet recital, or something to hold you back from taking that trip planned four summers ago. College is the perfect time to get away from home and go out into the real world.

It's important to get away from everything you know at one point in your life. There is a whole world full of risk, chance, and experience. The security you have in your hometown can be traded in for adventure and change. There's a time to try something new, learn something that blows your mind, or go somewhere that takes your breath away. That time is now, to feel like you are actually doing something worthwhile with your life.

It is important to get away from where you have grown up for some of your life. You need to grow on your own, without anyone there to tell you you're wrong or out of line being a certain way. The transition from high school to college is the gift of independence. You choose who you get to be without anyone holding your past against you. It's a do-over, a second chance after the mistakes and regrets you lived through in high school. Yet, being away from home has its drawbacks as you lose familiar faces, a steady schedule, and many creature comforts. But, all of these can be found in a new place with time. Leaving the place you grew up gives you another chance to grow again, without boundaries. Travel whenever you get an opportunity because it may not come again. Test your limits while living your actual dreams. Go out and explore the world—you're only here once and don't have time to take it for granted. Leaving everything you know sounds scary, but there are great memories to be made out there.

Whether this new place for you is two hours from home, or 20, it's different, it's exciting and it's change. It is important to get away from where you grew up and learn from the adventures you embark on. It is the best way to find yourself and who you want to be. It's what you'll remember when you look back on everything you've done.

Cover Image Credit: Madison Burns

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For Camille, With Love

To my godmother, my second mom, my rooted confidence, my support


First grade, March. It was my first birthday without my mom. You through a huge party for me, a sleepover with friends from school. It included dress up games and making pizza and Disney trivia. You, along with help from my grandma, threw me the best birthday party a 7-year-old could possibly want.

During elementary school, I carpooled with you and a few of the neighborhood kids. I was always the last one to be dropped off, sometimes you would sneak a donut for me. Living next door to you was a blessing. You helped me with everything. In second grade, you helped me rehearse lines for history day so I could get extra credit. In 4th grade, you helped me build my California mission.

You and your sister came out to my 6th grade "graduation". You bought me balloons and made me feel as if moving onto middle school was the coolest thing in the entire world.

While you moved away from next door, you were a constant in my life. Going to Ruby's Diner for my birthday, seeing movies at the Irvine Spectrum and just hanging out, I saw you all the time. During these times, you told me about all of the silly things you did with my mom and dad, how my mom was your best friend. I couldn't have had a greater godmother.

In middle school, you pushed me to do my best and to enroll in honors. You helped me through puberty and the awkward stages of being a woman.

Every single time I saw you, it would light up my entire day, my week. You were more than my godmother, you were my second mom. You understood things that my grandma didn't.

When you married John, you included me in your wedding. I still have that picture of you, Jessica, Aaron and myself on my wall at college. I was so happy for you.

Freshmen year of high school, you told me to do my best. I did my best because of you. When my grandma passed away that year, your shoulder was the one I wanted to cry on.

You were there when I needed to escape home. You understood me when I thought no one would. You helped me learn to drive, letting me drive all the way from San Clemente to Orange.

When I was applying to colleges, you encouraged me to spread my wings and fly. You told me I should explore, get out of California. I wanted to study in London, you told me to do it. That's why, when I study abroad this Spring in London, I will do it for you.

When I had gotten into UWT, you told me to go there. I did and here I am, succeeding and living my best in Tacoma. I do it for you, because of you.

When I graduated high school and I was able to deliver a speech during our baccalaureate, you cheered me on. You recorded it for me, so I could show people who weren't able to make it to the ceremony. You were one of the few people able to come to my actual graduation. You helped me celebrate the accomplishments and awards from my hard work.

When your cancer came back, I was so worried. I was afraid for you, I was afraid of what I would do without the support you had always given me. When I was in Rome, I went to the Vatican and had gotten a Cross with a purple gem in the middle blessed by the Pope to help you with your treatments. It was something from me and a little bit of my mom in the necklace, the gem.

Now, sitting so far from you away at college just like you wanted me to. I miss you. I wish I was there to say goodbye.

I'll travel the world for you, write lots of stories and books for you, I will live life to the fullest for you.

You are another angel taken too early in life. Please say hello to my parents and grandma in Heaven for me.

Lots of love,


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