Whenever one of my friends starts crushing on someone, it’s considered seriously controversial. As soon as one of my friends even mentions a cute person from their Organic Chemistry class, they are immediately plagued with questions: What’s their name? What do they look like? Are they a virgin? What’s their social security number?
When I changed my relationship status on Facebook, one of the questions people most frequently asked me was: "how did you two meet?" It's a simple, inevitable question that I used to be a little embarrassed to answer because whenever I would say, "We met on Tinder," the response is always a disappointed, “Oh." Or a scandalous “ooh!" About 495 of my 1,282 Facebook friends currently have a Tinder, that’s roughly two out of five friends… So why is it considered a faux pas?
Tinder is a simple app that connects to your Facebook profile, and lets you see people around you (based on your choice of gender, age range, and distance between 1-100 miles away from you). Each profile typically has a few pictures of the person, a short bio about them, and tells you if you have any mutual friends; if the person sounds like someone you would like to get to know more, you swipe right… If they sound like someone you're not interested in, you swipe left. On concept, it doesn’t even have to be a “hookup” app, it can just be an app you use to make new friends around you.
Between text messages, emails, Snapchat, Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, and every other form of digital communication, we spend a lot of time on our phones every day. Some days, it’s not unusual to spend more time talking to people on your phone or online than in physical person. While I celebrate the natural chemistry that comes with meeting someone at a bookstore or a rock concert, I think there’s nothing wrong with meeting somebody off of Tinder. We have the technology that gives us the ability to easily manage our lives and get things we want… if you are lonely and interested in getting back into dating, then why not download a Tinder? If there was no shame in asking your friends to set you up on a blind date in the 80’s because you were lonely, there should be no shame in downloading an app and finding someone you’re interested in now.
Of my 495 friends with Tinder profiles, one of them is in a happy, strong relationship with someone they met through Tinder, another one has a boyfriend and just uses Tinder as a way to make new friends, and the third uses Tinder when they just really want to have sex. In all three of those scenarios, I say “great!”. As humans, we all have times when we feel lonely, adventurous, and curious. I think Tinder is for people who have those feelings and want to do something about them, which is a lot more than a lot of people can say about their lives.
Every day, there are more and more online relationships emerging. It’s the 21st century way to find the love of your life… Or at least your next cuddle buddy. So I say, all hail the Tinder users! Whatever your intentions may be for using the app, good for you for going after what you want! Forget the people who say “oh” and “oooooh!” they have no reason to comment and you have no reason to listen to them.
