When you're living the single life, some days seem to stretch on forever without a significant other, and some days fly by because you're too busy having fun with your friends. But then you blink, and a whole year has passed since your last serious relationship. Through the ups and downs, this past year has shown you everything the single life has to offer. I am speaking from experience when I say that being single for a year is better for learning about yourself than anything else. I was single for an entire year, and here's what happened.
Month one.
Quite frankly, coming right out of a relationship can be sad and can make us feel a little bit lonely. But within that first month, I stretched my metaphoric "single" wings and got ready to fly. This is the month of being TOO single ... I downloaded Tinder, went out and made so many memories with so many friends and just dove headfirst in to being newly on my own.
Months two and three.
These months were a pretty solid time. I had fun without being too over the top, and settled in well to the single life. I got used to not having a guy to text, call or Snapchat every single day and focused in more on my studies and friends, which is something we should all be doing anyway,, just saying. Life is great, I'm closer to my friends than ever before, and I'm starting to realize that I'm perfectly fine on my own.
Months four and five.
Ahhh, the holiday season — the time of year where everyone feels the need to be in a relationship. These months were the hardest, but I realized that being single meant that I could give my undivided attention to my family. The holidays are a lot more fun when you don't have to run around like a chicken with it's head cut off while you try to visit six houses for Thanksgiving dinner in one day. These months were a little bumpy, but I made it through unscathed and was still very much single.
Months six through eight.
These months were pretty easy. By this point, I had figured out my groove of class, friends, work and fun and was basically on cruise control. Maybe I had even forgotten what it was like to "date." I started to think about trying to actively date again, but I was honestly scared and didn't know if I would have time because I was too busy with life in general. These were the months that I had to learn the difference between really wanting to date for the right reasons or because I was feeling lonely from time to time.
Months nine and ten.
I started to go out on dates with people. I figured it was time to be more social and at least put myself out there for the sake of saying I did so. Obviously, none of the dates or people I "dated" worked out in my favor, but I have since learned that not everything is going to work and not everyone is going to get along like they do in the movies. I learned that dating is fun, but time consuming, and not for the faint at heart. Time to go back to just doing me.
Month eleven.
One day, I realized that I was the last single person in my immediate friend group. I do enjoy being fiercely independent, but when ALL of your close friends are being cute with their significant others, and you're perpetually the third wheel, your feelings get all out of whack. I got sad, but only for a minute, because more than anything else I was happy for all of my friends, and they have all unknowingly given me great examples of what to look for in my next relationship.
Month twelve.
Wow, did a year go by that fast? The saying holds true: Time flies when you're having fun. I made it a whole year without a boyfriend. I didn't die, I rarely felt lonely, and I never felt alienated or like I wasn't good enough for a boyfriend like I thought would happen. I learned that I'm incredibly independent and beyond capable of making myself happy. I learned what I do and do not like in a man, and I know that my self-esteem from learning these things has skyrocketed. I love to make jokes about my singleness, but it's just because I'm comfortable with it now. I know that eventually I will find a wonderful boyfriend, but until then, I have myself, my friends, my family and my own happiness. What else does a girl need?
