Whether it’s your senior capstone or that first 10 page SAGES essay, most of us have that one paper that we really just don’t want to write. No matter how you look at it, whether you're a humanities major, pre-med, or engineer, we all experience the same struggle of trying to write that painful paper on some irrelevant and obscure topic. Enter Spongebob Squarepants, who has helped us through everything from our earliest childhood. With his help, let’s look at the paper writing process from start to finish.
1. Getting that topic and thinking “Oh, I’ve totally got this.”
Whether you’ve had all semester or only a couple of weeks, usually you think it’s all under control when the paper is first assigned.2. The first deadline: outline or bibliography
Doing the minimum amount of work to get credit, you'll add the details later.
3. Procrastination
All the time you spend doing literally anything but your paper because reasons.
4. “Oh crap this paper is due in a week”
The realization that you don’t have all the time in the world.5. Mad scramble for sources
Realizing you’ve done absolutely none of the work on this paper and you have no idea what you’re actually writing about.6. Sit down and write
How many pages was this supposed to be?7. Break time!
“I’ve done enough work, I deserve three hours of Netflix.”
8. The “this paper is due in less than 24 hours” panic
“Oh crap, I’m so screwed.”
9. When your friend gives you useless advice, but lots of moral support
You love them, but this is just frustrating and generally not helpful.10. Considering just typing “aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa” on the page to reach your page limit
Bargaining, part 1.
11. Thinking to yourself “how much can I play with the margins to make this long enough?”
Bargaining, part 2.
12. Realizing that you have something coherent and finished enough to turn in
This glorious moment you've been working towards.
13. Submitting your paper like:
There's a special place in Hell for that one professor that demands a hard copy on the last day of finals…14. Celebrating the end of your semester!
Happy finals everyone!
