Dear Mom and Dad,
We fight every. Single. Day. Especially you, dad, and most of the time, like you said during our fight of the day today, it's because we are so much alike-way too much alike, even. We can be stubborn, arrogant, selfish-oh! And we also both love rock music. We also love peanut M&M's. Actually, I didn't even like them before you came around, but now that there's a never-ending package of them in the cupboard, they're pretty hard to resist.
At the end of the day, no matter how much we fight and how frustrated you can get me, I know that about 65%, maybe I'll even give you 70%, of the time, you are right. I know that you just want the best for me. Okay, so maybe 100% of the time...
I know I can make you mad. I know my dreams are sometimes bigger than conceivable, and well, not going to lie, that part of me is never going to go away. I'm always going to strive to achieve a greater purpose in life. I want to go to the West Coast, to Hollywood. I want to be a writer, and perhaps also a lawyer that "only stands up for the good side," and that's something I can't change. Even if it seems nearly impossible. I have a one track mind. When I want something, I stop at nothing to achieve it. Even if it's crazy and I don't have much of a plan.
But at the end of the day, I couldn't be me without you. I wouldn't be where I am without you. I am so thankful for you and your guidance, even when I scream and cry, and I don't act like it.
I wouldn't have the goals that I have without you. I wouldn't be starting to become a girl that I can love without you. Remember last year, when Juliet was over after softball practice, and you asked me what we wanted to be when we grew up? Juliet said a brain surgeon, and I said, "I have absolutely no idea. I still have a lot of time though. Stop pushing me so hard!"
That wasn't good enough for you. And, honestly, thank God it wasn't. Because if you never made me actually think about my future, well, I may not have much of one. I know who I am because of you. I know that anything is achievable with hard work because of you. I know that I need a plan in life for things to eventually come together. As much as I would like to, sometimes, I can't just jump right in. Baby steps can lead you to beautiful destinations, sometimes. I know what I want to fix about myself, because of you.
I love you. I wouldn't love my life as much without you in it.
And now, for you, mom.
Lately it's been driving me crazy, but I just haven't felt as close with you. And I miss you so much. I am so sorry for all of the times you have asked for help and I didn't return the favor of everything you do for me continuously. I'm sorry that sometimes I don't appreciate you as much as I should. Sometimes I take you for granted. And maybe it's because you have worked so hard to give me the entire world.
I admire you so much. The way that you worked your butt off in college while simultaneously raising me. You've been through so much, and I never really give you enough credit for it.
Without you, I wouldn't be who I am or where I am today. You inspire me, and I hope that one day I can be as good of a mom as you are. I know that Dominic calls you stupid when you refuse to let him stay home, even though if he is faced with school, he would have to face the inevitable act of 'being a fish' for a school project. I know he calls you stupid and ridiculous, but really you're just an amazing mom who knows that her son is gonna have to face the music some day. May as well be today.
I don't know why you do all you do. I don't even know how you do what you do, at like 35 years old, being pregnant, working doubles as a nurse every day. Then, you get to come home to me asking for whatever it is-a ride to the mall, new track shoes, pizza for dinner, can you bring my friends and I to the football game tomorrow? And a ride home, too...
With my Sweet Sixteen tomorrow, that you guys have literally planned all by yourselves with the help of amazing family members, I just had to take a moment to tell you how blessed I am to have you in my life, even if most of the time, my words are inferring the exact opposite.
I wouldn't be who I am without you guys. And truthfully, I haven't even felt like much of myself lately. But, at the end of the day, being around you guys always makes me feel like myself again.
Everything I do in life, is for you. Because without you, I wouldn't have anything.
I love you,
Taylor Marie