DEVASTATION, DEVASTATION, DEVASTATION, D E V A S T A T I O N…

That’s all I’ve been seeing in the media lately which is horrific because my employment is in media! I’ve grown so used to the devastating news that I almost feel guilty when writing anything uplifting because I know that

1. More devastation is occurring
2. 9x out of 10 if it is dealing with a minority of any sort than the coverage isn’t probably accurate nor appropriately handled.

Both are burdens I carry every single day, being a young journalist that while is still trying to learn the ropes is still maintaining being black and a woman. I often question what employment will look like for me and how I will be able to sustain myself throughout the constant tug-of-war between my identity and culture against the forces of employment.

And while it often feels like I’m pressed and stressed, I’m finding my way through my more low times by searching for perspective and asking myself:

How do I sustain?

A new favorite writer of mine, Lauren Duca spelled out some suggestions in a recent article for those who wish to participate in politics, and while she suggested that those individuals show up for rallies, she also encouraged not showing up empty handed but providing resources that will sustain yourself and fellow participants. Something as simple as cases of water and snacks to rejuvenate protesters during their gruesome hours of standing in the gap for what we believe this country should be.

This thought alone was provoking and in the wake of Kenneka Jenkins death, I’ve begun questioning the ways in which I was preserving myself? If, I had been caring enough to bring cases of water to my own internal rally as I try to sift through questions.

When it comes to preservation and sustainability one thing I’m learning is that you cannot be afraid of change. The times around us are changing which means that naturally our feelings are subjected to switch. I feel grief more now than I have ever in my previous years, and in knowing such I must acknowledge that my responses are going to intensify due to the amounts that I am feeling, which means that my self-care must intensify as well!

Instead of maybe taking 1 day out of the week to do something that I really wish to, I now take multiple if not all 5 days of my work week, why? BECAUSE I ABSOLUTELY NEED IT! The more I hurt over the experiences of this world, the more I am desiring to discover the joy that is still left and I value that desire enough to pursue it! As should you… while on this trail I think it’s particularly appropriate to share some advice a valued friend of mine shared over lunch. As we both are just yapping away over chipotle she abruptly confessed that she’s been listening to herself more, and agreeing with what her body has been telling her.

She furthered explained instead of defying her own needs to achieve what she believes is the ‘greater good’ she’s been taking time to listen to the “little
needs” and by doing such she’s discovered that in actuality they aren’t ‘little’ at all!

*Case in point, when she feels tired she finds time to retreat and find solace before returning to a day’s work.*

I believe that such can and should be done for emotional purposes, especially when it comes to the burdens we feel from employment, school, society, family, finances... I mean the list goes. If you pick one of these topics alone I’m sure you can recollect instances in which you felt as if you’re rioting for your own sense of safety and justice, trying to demand answers and footing against the obligations that seem to continually knock you down!

I know, I personally haven’t been listening to my body. As it has been telling me to relax through this troublesome time and find joy in the quiet of my mind. I haven’t agreed when my mind has told me perhaps I’ve had enough social media for the day or that I’ve spent enough time talking about the more important ‘issues’ in life. I’ve ignored the much needed “how are you’s?” that are followed by actually stopping to listen for the answer. I’ve neglected such for what I presumed was much ‘bigger’... and as a result, I’ve started carrying about the social work that needs to be done and less about the people who need it… The projects have become more important than the purpose and that in itself calls for preservation!

So, I’ve been getting back to the basics. Doing inventory of the information that I am processing on the daily basis and demanding attention for both how I am processing and where I am placing this information. I’ve been cleaning out my closet of ideologies and ridding myself of those that just don’t fit anymore. Ultimately giving myself room for those changes I previously mentioned and the time to hurt through them, should I need to.

I’ve been challenging myself to stop chasing after the quick solutions and strap tight my boots for the journey… for the LONG-HAUL because any good thing takes what… time? Meaning any good work will do just the same. I believe I am a good work, just as the rest of my fellow humanity and we will take time. Yet if we’re ever going to come around we’ll need to sustain and preserve what love is already there. So, when feeling weighed down by the harshness of reality its illusions of being impossible… remember that one thing is certain and two is for sure the work is being done, whether you see it or not… you’re growing, you’re learning and you’re changing environments around you for the better. Just focus on sustaining!

And lastly some cases of water for your personal protests:

“Note to self: It is all working out, for the greater good. It is worked out for your own good”- Olivia Jade,

“Finally be strong in the Lord and the strength of his might”- Ephesians 6:10

“You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you” -Isaiah 26:3

“Today I affirm, that I am healing through it. I know my value and trust my ability to be courageous as I move forward.”- Alex Elle

“Read books that fill you. Listen to music that moves you. Keep company that uplifts you. Engage in positive self-talk. Be your best self”- Alex Elle

… and I echo that to say I hope you’ll do what it takes to preserve your best self.