The full definition of feminism, according to the online Merriam Webster Dictionary is "the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes." This seems like common sense to me, and to lots of others out there. But, some compare feminists to man hating "feminazis," and I'm here to tell you that these are in no way the same thing.
In history classes, we view the passing of the 19th Amendment (voting rights for women) as a chapter in American history, which was written in Sharpie, and the page turned from it. That is, it was an issue during the time, but has since been permanently “fixed;” the problem has been established and we have moved on. Yet, we still have a day designated to raise awareness of the inequality between the sexes. Equal Pay Day is a day designated to the public awareness of the wage gaps between men and women.
Let’s say a woman and her male coworker, working the same role in the same company, kept track of the money made in the calendar year of 2015. On December 31st, the man stopped counting. On April 12th of the following year (last Tuesday), our woman in the work force finally hit the same amount of pay that her coworker did in only twelve months. Another way of explaining it, the average woman has to work nearly three and a half months more than the average man to make the same amount. And this is for white women, not to mention black or Latina women, for which their “equal pay day” has not been met yet this year.
The fact that not every American citizen could vote is astounding to us now, but it was a fact, and it was actually normal, in our democracy, that not everyone was treated equally under the law. It is such a clear issue to us now, and we think how could this country that preaches equality deprive this right from half of its population? How could they not have seen the absurdity? Or, the question that puzzles me the most, Why did they have to struggle so much for these rights which seem so fundamental? It baffles me, as I’m sure it does many of you (both male and female readers).
While women did get the vote, the fight is obviously not over, as illustrated by the need for an Equal Pay Day. As illustrated through women whose comments are ignored at board meetings, as illustrated by the vast gap between the number men and women in powerful positions… The list goes on and on, and I’m sure all of you feminists out there know all too well.
But now, I’m looking at you men out there, and maybe even you women who still don't see the need for feminism. If you haven’t given up on this feminist rant yet, hear me out. On behalf of the ladies: We aren’t trying to attack you. We aren’t trying to be “better” than you, we just want the same level of basic human rights that you have.
Gender equality, to you, seems like it was already a given. You don’t know why your great-great-great grandfathers gave the suffragettes such a hard time, but you didn’t think it was an issue anymore. Maybe you didn’t know about the wage gap because it doesn’t apply to you. You agree that these were/are legitimate issues. You don’t know why these issues should exist at all, so when your buddy’s girlfriend calls your comment sexist, you get offended. (Disclaimer: I'm not going to say that all of you out there agree with what I'm saying here, but I hope some of you can relate to this, and maybe learn a little something from it)
Let me break this down for you: It wasn’t just about the vote. It’s not just about equal pay. It’s about equal respect. I can recall when one of my professors has told me that her comments are continuously ignored at department meetings. One of my high school teachers told me about a time when she confronted the wage gap to a previous boss, to which he replied “well, we thought you wouldn’t be here for long because you’ll want to have children.” I remember times when I’ve been talking to guy friends, and what I’ve said isn’t even acknowledged. I’ve overheard students walking to class behind me, talking about the girl at that party last night who was “super cool, but not very pretty.”
There is obviously a gap in respect between the sexes. But, this isn't necessarily your fault. Feminists might call you out for calling Wonderwoman hot, but Wonderwoman was designed to be objectified in this way... we fell for it. Is this not offensive? School dress codes oppress young women because boys "can't concentrate"? Is this not offensive?
Why should you care? Well, I know that you know your mother is the strongest, most amazing person in the world, and you will call her for advice on anything because let’s be real, moms know everything. I know that you know your girlfriend or sister or friend is a genius, and should be recognized as such. There are women in your life whom you love and respect. If you love them, please know that the issues I’ve mentioned will all apply to them at some point in their lives.
Also, not only does sexism hurt the people you love, it hurts you too. While women are subject to all of the kinds of oppression previously mentioned, men are, too. How are you supposed to impress someone if your body doesn’t look like Magic Mike? It should be ok to be sensitive, it should be ok to say you don’t agree with your guy friends on something. You don’t have to be just like everyone else to be cool—these issues effect everyone, not just women.
So, when your girlfriend (or girl-friend) tells you about this stuff, you say you're a feminist, sure, why not. You’re now aware of the problem and you agree it sucks… But when you’re with your guy friends, respect for women seems to go out the window (whether you’re aware of it or not). There has been progression in feminist voices, but they seem to be voiced by women and ignored by men. As strong as these women’s voices are, there can’t be real change if only fifty percent of the population works towards it. How cool would it be if the millennials are the generation to actually obtain not only political and economic equality, but social equality too?
So, what can you do? You may feel like you don’t have a right to talk about gendered oppression because it doesn’t affect you. This is somewhat true, there’s definitely a fine line, and some women are going to be more sensitive to this than others. But, try being sensitive to the issue, try to notice the issues in your everyday life. If you just notice, you can make a change within yourself to prevent gendered biases, maybe you even say something, and prevent it from happening in others. Talk to the ladies in your life about it, see what they have to say, because the issue has definitely affected them, I guarantee it.
Gendered issues, slut shaming, wage gaps, respect gaps, and the “macho complex” are all issues that prevalently effect all of us. Women are sick of it, men should be too. So, don’t let the term “feminism” mislead you. All it means is that human beings should be treated like human beings, despite a difference in body parts. Men and women have equal potential to change the world, equal potential to make a difference.
