Dear Male Body Shamer,
This is not the first time I have witnessed this attitude, but I cannot believe what I have heard with my own ears. How can you stand there and claim, “If she lost 40, 50 pounds she would look good. Now, I’m not saying oh my God I have to have you right now good, but she would look good?”
Who gave you the right to declare that if an unknowing, already beautiful woman, lost weight, she would look better? I am tempted to retort, 'Unless you look like Zac Efron, you have no right to make that claim'--which you don’t, but that is a super bitchy, gives feminism a bad name, thing to say.
Instead, I will say this. What if that girl you completely dehumanized was your sister, spouse, or even your daughter? I think, hopefully, you would feel different about people making careless, hurtful comments. Those words and that mindset are very dangerous in our culture. It leads to distorted body image and eating disorders. I know personally, my mental and physical health took a severe beating over similar mindsets expressed by other thoughtless people. I am not saying this just because you are a man, if you were a woman, I would say the same thing.
No one likes to feel less than, but for some unknown reason, you have no problem body shaming unsuspecting women. I don’t think you would appreciate if girls made fun of your height or penis size, so why is our weight fair game? You don’t walk in her shoes; you don’t know what her life is like. Maybe she has a health condition that makes losing weight difficult or maybe she likes the way she is and doesn’t feel she needs to change for anyone--especially you?
What is most problematic to me is that you only consider her “looking good” once she loses weight. Why does a little extra skin make her go from “looking good” to not good enough? She still has the same personality, eyes, hair, etc. You are as shallow as a kiddy pool on a hot day. Women are beautiful no matter what size they are. She can always lose the weight if she wants to, but you have an ugly personality.
From,
A Woman Sick of Body Shaming
