For years, people have been calling me "crazy" for never wanting to have kids. I mean, that's supposed to be a woman's purpose in life, right? Absolutely not.
I honestly believe that having children would be my worst mistake and there are many reasons for that. (The first one being that I just really don't like screaming, kicking, and crying little beings always ruining things like a baseball game or a nice dinner. Not my thing.) However, the rest of my reasons are not personal preferences; they're things I cannot control.
1. Ignorance
I am not a straight, white male. I am a Hispanic, Indian, and German (though European immigrants don't count, right?) woman. I am a minority no matter how pale I get. There are people out there that HATE my ethnicity with a passion, and for what reason? I've seen the public staring at my family in turbans like they're terrorists. Considering viral videos, I'm sure there are some people that cringe when my family speaks Spanish in public. I would never let my child deal with ignorance like that.
2. Mental health? Taboo
I do not want my child suffering from an illness and not having the courage to tell someone about their struggles. These are the invisible diseases — so they say. I would not be able to tell if my child is hurting unless they tell me. I would hate not knowing there was anything wrong until it was too late because my child didn't want to be called a "nutjob" or be harassed at school, work, etc. Mental health is just as important as physical health and even affects physical health.
3. Sexuality and gender determine worth and rights
Come on, people. Just because a man falls in love with a man, that means he shouldn't have basic human rights like the rest of us? A transgender person cannot serve our country because they don't feel comfortable in their given body? Let's see you on the front lines, then. I really would like to know why someone's sexual preference determines their rights or ruins their image. If you fall in love with a male, that's great! Did you just fall in love with a female? Awesome! I hope she makes you happy. Love is love. What they do behind closed doors does not hurt you, them, or anyone else. Let's focus on bigger issues.
4. Societal pressures
There are many of these. Let's start with school. I'm good at school and, for that, I'm lucky. But this is not where I want to be; I have to be here. I want to live my life before I die, not work myself into a ball of stress, anxiety, and a lifetime of debt. I don't want to be in an office. I want to be exploring the world, its wonders, and learning about what I want rather than what a board of education thinks I need to know (Even though they haven't been in school for 50 years). I don't want my child feeling as trapped as I do.
Next, gender norms. I know that I shop in the boys' section and society frowns upon it, but, ladies: Tell me that your boyfriend's clothes aren't more comfortable. You can wear that comfort 24/7 if you just switch to the other side of the store. Amazing, right?
Marriage and children are next. That's yet another reason I'm writing this. I don't need a husband or children to live a full, happy life. I'll be happier without having to answer to someone til the day I die. I just want lots of dogs.
5. Is today the day?
Is today the day that my child gets abducted? Is it the day that my child just goes missing? When I wake up today and kiss my child goodbye before school, will it be the last time? Is today the day they get hit by a drunk driver while on their way home from work? There are constant worries. Today's society is not safe for anyone. People don't care about their own well-being, which, in turn, hurts other people. I will not let my child pay for others' mistakes. I will not let my child's last breath be in fear or looking down the barrel of a gun.
Until these issues get resolved, I never want to have a child. I do not want to put them through what we all have to go through in today's day and age.
