“Oh my god, Edan, will you ever stop flirting with the cafeteria ladies?”
My friends always make fun of me for my interactions with the women who swipe my lunch card, because apparently smiling and engaging in a jumpy, jovial conversation translates into me wanting something more than just food.
The thing is, I make sure to smile at people, especially those who work in the service industry. An honest smile is the easiest way to show sincere gratitude to people who bust their behinds to make sure your tummy is happy, or who handle the idiocracy of humanity within department stores for hours on end. A smile is all it takes to show these people that perhaps their work means something and that they’re not indispensable robots at the whim of the human condition. Believe me, I worked in a restaurant for a long time, and no one’s expecting you to get on your knees in gratitude, but a little smile after the third trip to the kitchen for your freaking third order of chicken wings will do just fine.
But smiling is more than just a display of gratitude. When I walk through my college campus or bike home from the gym, I try to make my resting face a goofy little grin, or at least maintain an inviting, trusting expression. When someone passes me, I try to catch their eye and smile at them or bid them a good morning. Point is, I make an effort to display my pearly whites, because at any point in time within a public space, there’s a hella good chance that everyone around you is either going to be frowning or impassive.
As a result, I’m pretty sure everyone thinks I’m like, really high. I get so many comically-raised eyebrows and little chuckles on a daily basis. It’s hilarious. But what really matters is that I make people smile in response. Stoic expressions will break apart into wide grins, frowns will actually turn upside down, and when the vibes are right, conversations will bloom. I don’t care if people think I’m stoned— if there’s a solid chance that I’ve made somebody’s day, I’ll be Tommy Chong for all I care.
When you smile at a stranger, you remind them that they exist, that they’re important and have an influence, because even though they don’t know you, they know that for some reason, they elicited a smile from you, and this can work wonders on one’s self-worth. Smiling at strangers is also a source of a small exhilaration, because in a culture where people can sit inches from each other on a bus and never interact, there’s a nice little rush in meeting someone’s gaze and throwing a smile their way.
But it’s not all about everyone else. A conscious effort to smile more can help you, too. For those who are afflicted by depression, a common exercise is to try and smile several times in front of the mirror as an attempt to show them that they are still capable of smiling, that a display of happiness is still something they know how to do. So if you smile at people and they smile in return, there’s a whole lot of smiling going on and that can help a lot if all that’s on your mind is that math exam you’re going to fail.
So brush your teeth and get working on those cheek muscles. Smiling is important, even if your friends think you’re flirting with 40-year-old women or if people think you’re as baked as a strawberry shortcake.
