Recently, a friend of mine participated in the #10ToesChallenge, creating a song that touches on a big problem that our generation faces today (you can listen to it here). The problem can easily be described as the “hook up” culture that seems to be engulfing millennials. This song really inspired me to begin thinking about this culture that can be seen almost every weekend on a college campus. Here’s the scene: you and your friends are at a Frat Party, the dance floor is open and the Jungle Juice is flowing, (but obviously, you don’t drink any because underage drinking isn’t cool). Your friends immediately get bombarded by a cute boy named Brad and his Delta Theta Phi brother, Chad, and they all start hanging out. Next thing you know you’re watching your friends making out with boys they haven’t known for more than five minutes, so you go into mom mode and make sure no one heads towards the stairs. You get home, put them to bed, then laugh the next morning when they can’t even remember what the guys look like. Does this scenario remind you of anything? Maybe last weekend? Maybe it’s even a prediction of your next night out? Well, I’m here to tell you that although it may be funny the first few times, I’m over it.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I love my friends and I’ve been guilty of cheering them on during their game of tonsil hockey, but not anymore. I have decided that people deserve so much more than just hooking up with a person they will never see again.
Now let me preface what I want to say: hooking up doesn’t make you a bad person, and this isn’t me judging or shaming, I honestly just think that some people have never heard that it’s okay to not make out with every boy who seems interested. SO, here we go.
You do not need a boy to validate you. Seriously. You don’t.
You’re beautiful and funny and smart. You are in this world for a reason, and that reason is not to be on the Snap Story of the entire Sigma Tau Lambda pledge class. Yes, maybe it will make you feel pretty and wanted for an hour, but the next morning it will only make you feel like taking a shower. You can do so much better than a drunk guy in a dark basement. You’ll find your Prince one day, but don’t waste your time kissing frogs.
Discover YOURSELF, before you discover him.
Yes, I said it: LOVE YOURSELF FIRST. I cannot scream this loud enough. I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, and at the time it needs to. Instead of actively searching for a guy to fill your time right now, work on searching yourself to figure out what you’ll be filling your future with. I’m not saying don’t go to parties or to stop talking to boys, and spend all your time studying. Although you should remember that everything is good in moderation, you need to still live your life and make memories that will last forever. You are going to have the most fun when you’re confident in who you are, and truly happy with the decisions you are making.
In the end, this your life.
You are going to make whatever decisions you want and some girl on the internet will not change that. I’m not trying to change you, I swear. I’m just trying to make you think about your worth, and everything you have to offer. I don’t care who you are, or what you’ve done; you were perfectly made and have a purpose.You deserve a lifelong love with somebody who respects you and adores you for your intelligence and humor. You do not deserve a 2 am “you up?” text.
You are beautiful, you are intelligent, you are funny, you have potential, and you have so much to offer to this world… remember that.
