I feel like I have to justify myself a lot. I always have to explain that I am a writer, which means sometimes I can be a little too personal. But when I write I feel safe. I feel like I am actually allowed to feel and I am allowed to express myself in ways I can’t off paper. I understand that my voice puts me in a position where I have the ability to hurt people, and it has hurt people. But I will never be sorry for actually sharing my feelings. So, I will never be sorry for anything I write. I refuse to.
Growing up, we are all taught to keep our thoughts to ourselves for the sake of not hurting other people. So I used to keep it all in a notebook in my backpack instead. I’m probably in the wrong for some of the things I do, but I’m only 20 and I am still learning.
With my writing, I feel like I can actually help people. Maybe someone will relate to my articles and realize they aren’t alone. Or maybe I am too optimistic and I grew up differently and I don’t have the ability to conquer whatever obstacles come my way. But at least I believe I can make a change. No one should get shut down for their opinions or anything they believe in. No one has the right to take that away from you. If you feel like you are great enough to do big things, then you shouldn’t let anyone or anything get in your way.
People feed off of other people’s failures and drama. I always get told that I need to learn and I need to grow up, but it isn’t up to them. I used to be a dramatic (I still am dramatic) kid in grade school, who loved drama. But when I got to college, I learned how to avoid it. I began taking myself out of situations that made me angry because they weren’t worth it. I will not surround myself with people who will make me upset. There isn’t a point to put myself through emotional pain. I write to help me stay emotionally stable. When I write, it gets out all of the negativity that was building up inside of me. I literally feel the stress come off my fingertips. It isn’t human to keep all of my frustration inside. Asking me to stop doing what I love isn’t human either. I share my writing because I have never been this proud of anything I have ever done in my life. My dreams are coming true, one article at a time and I will not quit.