First, let me start by saying rape and sexual assault don’t only happen to women but that's where the focus of this article will be. After attending my first year of college my eyes have been opened to how common sexual assault is. Every few days an email or text alert would be sent out warning the campus of a sexual assault that just took place on campus. Majority of the time I would look at the email and think "how does this keep happening?" Isn't our campus supposed to be safe? Then I realized sexual assault can happen anywhere. Young women whose lives are being ruined by a touch they never wanted.
We now live in a world where we reach the age of 18 and go to college and we are told some of the most important rules by our parents: never put your drink down while at a party, never walk home alone at night, always stick with a friend. Some nights I’ve thought “okay, none of these guys can be trusted” which is sad to have crossed my mind. Most men do not rape but the ones that do are making it hard for women to believe that there will be a guy at a frat house who will genuinely want to just help her get home safe.
An issue along with the amount of sexual assaults is how lightly the word "rape" is taken. "That exam just raped me" "Well no wonder she got raped! Did you see what she was wearing?" "That's what happens when you drink too much." All of these are comments I've heard and have been repulsed by. Rape jokes are also a thing because apparently to some people rape is funny. How? I don't know but every time I hear one I cannot be silent. You never know who has survived sexual assault or rape. What if it's your friends’ girlfriend and you make a joke? What if it's your sister who has never told anyone? What if it's your best friend? Is something you consider a joke really worth damaging them even more? Imagine triggering someone into a flashback of their sexual assault or rape because let me tell you it is heartbreaking to watch. In that moment you would give anything in the world to take their pain away but you can’t and this is something some people still choose to joke about.
I’ve seen the after effects of women who survived sexual assault; PTSD, eating disorders, depression, and substance abuse are just some of the end results. I’ve seen the look in my friends eyes as she told me her rapist made her want to end her life. I’ve seen another friend deliver the most beautiful poem where she mentioned how it didn’t matter that she said no. I’ve had another friend who channeled her abuse into the most amazing art worked I’ve ever seen. The strength it took for my one friend to continue pushing through life is remarkable. The strength it took my other friend to stand up and read her poem was incredible. The talent my friend found from her trauma is inspiring. Do you see the problem here? I just listed three different friends. Never in my life would I imagine something terrible happening to someone I love and instead it has happened to multiple. This isn’t even the half of the stories I have to tell.
To every sexual assault survivor out there, I want you to know that's exactly what you are... A survivor. You are brave and cannot be broken. And you are the reason I will never use the word rape lightly.
