"When you find someone you wanna keep around, you do something about it." -Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother
Buckle up everyone, because this is about to bring up some very hostile emotions.
We all have that one person in our lives where we think, "Gosh, they were the right person, but the timing was just off." No. That is just not how love works. The people we usually meet at the wrong time, are usually just the wrong people. Now, don't get me wrong, I love a good happy ending, but the minute someone decides that right now is just not a good time to be with you, that is when you need to start to reevaluate if this person truly is the one for you.
That's the thing about love, it's confusing in this generation. So, of course you're going to want to believe that this person, who you're absolutely head over heels for, is the one for you. The sad truth is, those are all just excuses so you don't have to face reality that they're just the wrong person.
The right people are timeless. Which means, they're going to want to grow with you, not out of you. You're allowed to help someone better themselves and stand by them as they grow up and mature, but you're not allowed to put your life on hold to help raise someone else's child. If someone truly loves you, they will not want to ever risk having to go a day without you. So, when someone says you're the right person, just wrong timing, that's usually just an excuse to leave. If someone wants to leave, than let them leave because sometimes, letting go is easier than holding onto something that isn't even really there.
The right person will make you want to throw all of your original plans for the day away, just so you can run errands with them. The "right person" will not make you sit around second guessing if you really want to be with them. Most importantly, if it's the "right person," it shouldn't be hard. It should just come easily. The "right person" will make you think that whatever future you had planned before them won't be nearly as amazing unless they are in it.
The "right person" would never deal so much hurt on you simply because they think the timing isn't right. The unfortunate truth is, sometimes, someone doesn't love you the way they did. That is okay too. Its totally okay to think that at one point this person was the "right person" for so many reasons, but the minute they decide to leave is when you need to cut ties. If you don't know where you stand in someone's life, simply because they're "not ready" for you yet, is a sign all in itself. You can spend years with someone and be miserable and yet date someone for a month and be more in love than you ever have before. It's not about quantity, but about quality.
The amazing thing is though, once you do find the "right person", it'll make you look back on who you thought was the right one and thank God that it didn't work out with them. In order to get unstuck you have to start moving. Once you do start moving, you'll realize that even if you do fall in love with the wrong people, the right person will always be at the end waiting. You just have to know when to start moving again.
Mark Sloan from Grey's Anatomy said it best:
"If you love someone, you tell them. Even if you're scared that it's not the right thing. Even if you're scared that it'll cause problems. Even if you're scared that it will burn your life to the ground, you say it, and you say it loud and you go from there."
The right person will say it.
