In middle school and high school the final bell commencing summer break was the sound of sweet, sweet freedom and pure happiness.
In college, it’s a little more bitter-sweet. You have to pack up your dorm room, say goodbye to your friends and go home to Mom and Dad, but hey, it’s free food and no more studying, right?
Well, that’s only the case if you aren’t taking the dreadful thing known as summer classes.
When we were little summer classes were seen as punishment and, trust me, they still are. A lot of times, college students will take classes to get ahead. However for the majority of us, let’s be real, we take them to catch up.
So I kind of graduated college and now I’m coming clean about it. Yes, I did graduate from the School of Journalism. Yes, they said I could be an actual journalist. However, Stony Brook doesn’t exactly feel the same way. I don’t technically have a degree YET because I need to take eight more random credits. I could go on and on about why this is unfair since all my pre-reqs, major and minor requirements are done, but I won’t.
So, if you’re like me, you’ve accepted your fate and you’re stuck in school. But, can we all agree that summer courses are actually the worst? For those of you who’ve been #blessed enough to not take any, let me explain our pain:
Summer Classes Steal Your Soul:
Say goodbye to your social life and hello to social studies. Soon you will be turning down Taco Tuesdays because you have morning classes. On that rare occasion that you do decide to go out, you might find yourself in this situation: you are with your friends, getting ready for a lit pregame, about to hit your favorite bar, and remember that you have five discussion posts, a mini essay and a quiz due by midnight. Not only is your vibe killed, but also you basically just failed that week of class. Bring on the tequila shots.
Work, Work, Work, Work:
Summer classes are basically regular courses on steroids. The university thinks that since it’s the summer vacation you have all this free time. They make the classes longer, give more homework and figure that about a month is enough time to learn this complicated new subject. When in reality, the only work you should be doing over summer is learning how to become a bronze goddess, date a lifeguard and rescue puppies. You should NOT be mastering ethnic literature or quantum physics.
Textbooks Are A Must Buy:
Usually most college students don’t actually buy the textbooks. We take our parent’s money, say we bought them and use the money for food, but if you were ever naive enough to buy them, then they were probably used as a coaster or as a pillow.
Well, with summer classes there is none of that. You actually need to buy them, open them and attempt to learn from them. The classes are faster-paced and if they are online- congratulations, you’ve just became your own the teacher. (Disclaimer: you are not getting a second degree for teaching yourself).
Online Classes and the Introduce Yourself Post:
This is my personal biggest pet-peeve about summer classes. For some reason every online professor wants to try and engage their students while helping to foster virtual new friends. So, they think the perfect way to do this is by making your first assignment the infamous “Introduction Post.” This post is actually the devil.
Am I the only one who has had this conversation with themselves while writing it? “How do I come off kind of cool, but smart incase we have to do group work." “Does this sound awkward,” as you send your introduction to all your friends. “Yep. I’m awkward. Let’s start again.” “Wait, maybe I should use my Tinder bio? It seems to work on there.” In the end, you decide to post the most generic introduction based off the first person who posted.
Survival of the Fittest:
As your tan darkens and sleep schedule becomes more regulated, you realize that your classes are almost over. You find yourself wondering how that’s possible and if you’ve even learned anything. However, whether you’ve mastered organic chemistry or not, you still have to take that final. So you do what any college student would do and cram, pray that you pass, and promise yourself that you will never wait this long to study again.
Little do you realize, though, that while this summer class is coming to an end, a new semester is creeping up. And, that promise you just made to yourself is going to be put into action soon enough. May the odds forever be in your favor so you do not end up back in summer classes because if you couldn't tell, they are actually the worst.
