Being in your twenties comes with a lot more responsibility than what most people actually think. You never really appreciate as a kid everything you didn’t have to worry about. In high school, you think life is rough just trying to balance a social life and school but adulthood is a whole different level of rough. I have only had a small taste of this reality since I am only twenty and I am only struggling to support myself but I have experienced enough to say, it is definitely not easy.

Let me show you. Not only do I have bills to pay but I am a full-time college student. Obviously, I have to work to make money to pay my bills to have electricity to charge my laptop that leads to me being able to do my classwork to pass my classes to graduate. It is like a never ending chain of reactions. If one thing goes down in flames it damn near all can. Oh but then those bills don’t include feeding yourself. So that money you make also has to go towards groceries and toilet paper (unless you prefer to drip dry) I could probably assume you want a social life as well? That can get pretty pricey too. You better pick up an extra shift so you have the extra money to do so. And this is just a glimpse of the real world. Now, do see how stressful adulting can get?

Some of you are reading this thinking “Why is she throwing herself a pity party?” In that case, let me makes things very clear that that is not the case at all! Being on my own and relying on myself to survive is awesome. Yes, I said awesome! I would rather bust my ass every day for what I have than have someone hand everything to me on a silver platter. I enjoy being able to say, “I got here on my own” Although it is absolutely exhausting and sometimes I question how I will make it, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

The past few months of my life has taught me that people are disappointing. It has made me realize that I never want to have to depend on anyone for anything. I hate feeling like I “owe” someone for helping me or for doing something for me. Whatever the case may be, I will make sure I get it on my own. This way no one can say “you wouldn’t have that if it wasn’t for me” Instead, I can proudly say, I did it on my own. I am going to work hard for the sole purpose of benefiting myself in the future no matter how much effort it takes to get there.

In my eyes, people who have it easy and get life handed to them on a silver platter lack a very important quality that you need to survive in a world like today and that is self-discipline. These people who never have any accountability for their actions will continue through life thinking nothing is their fault, and everything is owed to them. Nothing should be easily given, it has no value that way. Although these kind of people are my least favorite I am so very thankful for them, they have shown me exactly who I do not want to be.

Seeing these people get everything handed to them irks me. It sometimes even angers me. I bust my ass working and going to school and still constantly feel so behind on everything. Sometimes I get really tired and catch myself asking God why life can’t come that easy for me but then I realize how blessed I am to know the struggle. When I grow up and am finally where I want to be financially and in every other aspect, I won’t take it for granted, I'll live it to the fullest knowing I earned all my success. I refuse to just watch and wish for something to happen, instead, I will get on my knees and pray, then get on my feet and work for it.

“Working hard becomes a habit, a serious kind of fun. You get self-satisfaction from pushing yourself to the limit, knowing that all the effort is to pay off in the end” –Mary Lou Retton