Recently I had a conversation with a good friend about her relationship with her boyfriend who is an atheist. She said it's really been weighing on her heart recently because she feels like she could marry him except for this one thing: he isn't very accepting of her faith and tries to argue every point of the Bible and her beliefs when she brings them up. She said she always thought she would marry a Christian but "maybe that wasn't God's plan for her after all." All I could think is no, no, no!!!
Now, far be it from me to comment on what God's plan is for someone else's life, but through everything I have ever read, every experience on my walk of faith so far leads me to believe that God's plan is for you to marry someone who loves Him. The Bible says a lot of things about relationships, mostly marriage but a lot can be said for what God intends when you are dating as well.
1. God is love.
This is VERY clear throughout the Bible. God is love, and if He is love then how could your significant other ever really love you if he or she doesn't know God and His love? How can they ever attempt to love and seek your heart the way God does if they don't know or care about God? This just seems directly contradictory to me.
2. Praying for each other.
I want him to pray for me and for our children someday when we are married. I will pray for my boyfriend/husband every single day, and it would hurt my heart to know my boyfriend/husband doesn't pray for me as well. That he doesn't pray for our children and their hearts.
3. I want to raise my children in church.
When I have children I want to raise them in church, not to push my faith on them but because the support and guidance that a church family can give you is one of the most powerful assets you can have as a parent. I have watched couples in my church go through pregnancy and begin their families, and the love, wisdom, and support showered on them is something I would never want to miss out on.
4. Worshiping together.
Do not get me wrong, worship is about God, and it doesn't matter who is in the room with you. However, coming before God together as a couple and praising Him, I believe, can strengthen a couples relationship. Not just because you are worshiping together in the same room, but also because watching someone pour their heart out in worship could only ever make me fall more in love with them and their heart for God.
5. Serving together.
I have a huge heart for service and going on mission trips, and I would love to be able to serve side by side with my significant other. I watch couples in my church serving together, and I have heard many of them say that serving together has strengthened their relationship for one big reason-it reminds them that this world is so much bigger than just themselves and their small problems. Serving helps them center themselves and focus on what life is really about.
6. I want a spiritual leader.
The Bible says that men are the spiritual heads of the households, and I want to be with someone who can someday lead my house. Dating and potentially marrying someone who isn't a Christian is dangerous for me as a Christian woman, because if he isn't following God then I know he cant be leading me in the direction I need to go. I want to be with the man who prays for guidance in our relationship, who trusts God with the plans for our future, who will lead my family in the direction God wants us to go.
7. Similar morals and values.
It is easy to cut out a lot of the grief and pain that many relationships go through now a days when you are dating someone with a heart after God. A man that is focused on God and focused on the right path, pursuing you with the intent of marrying one day and praying to God every day for guidance on that path will not be distracted by other women or entertain other ideas that would take him away from the plan God has for you.
In short, as a Christian woman I want to be with a man who shares my same values and goals. I want to fall in love with someone with a heart for God that will lead me and our future family in the path that God has set for us. I desire a man who daily fight for our relationship and works with me to keep our relationship on the path God has for us. I want a man who will sit with me at church and hold my hand while we pray. I truly believe that is the way God intended it to be. And I will wait for the Christian man that God has waiting for me.
