This Is Why I Love My College Friends

This Is Why I Love My College Friends

I didn't think I would find my people, but I did.

When you enter your first year of college, everything is new. New classes, new course load, new home, new routine, new responsibilities, and what's most terrifying, new friends. I had a lot of trouble adjusting in the beginning of the year. I became instant best friends with my roommate, but she knew a lot more people than I did. I had a bad orientation experience, and thought that would be reflective of my time at school.

I made close friends within the first couple weeks. We did everything together. We ate every meal together, mapped out our classes together before the first day, explored the downtown, did homework together. I was happy with my little group, but still thought we were missing out on that experience of meeting lots of new people every day. I wasn't as involved as I wanted, but I was too shy to join things.

It wasn't until my senior year in high school that I realized how much of an introvert I was. When I got to college, that realization sunk deeper into my consciousness. I tried to put myself out there, but everything felt so awkward. Meeting new people and everything it just felt so strange. We all knew how weird it was to ask everyone we met the same questions, "Where are you from?", "What's your major?", "Where are you living this semester?"

One of my roommate's friends she knew from orientation heard we were going to see the movie, It, one night and asked if he could bring some friends from his floor along. We all went together and had a really good time. They have been my best friends at school since.

The reason I liked them so much though is because, unlike other people I met at school, they actually really wanted to get to know me. They didn't pretend. When you go to school, and you tell people about yourself, make friends with the ones who are genuinely listening to you, think you're funny, and share your interests. DOn't become friends with someone because it's convenient.

As I said before, I am what they call an introverted extrovert. But when I made my group of friends at school, I found myself putting myself out there more, having more fun whenever I went out. They pushed me to relax. I worry so much and am lazy as anything. But I found that once I started hanging out with them, I was just so much happier.

I didn't want to come home anymore. I wanted to spend the rest of the semester getting to know them even more and being as good of a friend to them as they have been to me. And that's exactly what I've been doing.

Cover Image Credit: Jacey hammond

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I Drifted But Now I'm Reaching Out

I'm not going to isolate myself anymore.

I’ve noticed that since I started college, I dropped a lot of habits. Some were habits that I really needed to get rid of, such as picking at my nails and snacking way too much. Other habits, though, I really shouldn’t have dropped. Maybe I just got too busy or lazy, or maybe it was just something for the high school me. Yeah, I’ve changed a lot in college but I’m going to try and get back into the good habits I had.

College gave me a lot of time. Suddenly I had all this free time and I realized that it was entirely up to me what I wanted to do with it. The freedom is really great, I won’t deny that, but what I noticed was that I found myself alone a lot.

Maybe it was my intention that some days I just wanted some alone time, but more often than not I found myself realizing that I hadn’t seen or talked to friends in a while. I realized I wasn’t hanging out with people anymore. I was alone.

Now, I know the importance of myself reaching out. Before I always worried that there was a reason I wasn’t seeing or talking to people as often, I mean, there was school so maybe everyone was just busy.

But I feared that I was missing out on so much was because I was unwanted in those moments. After gaining confidence, I've decided won’t isolate myself anymore. I’m an outgoing person, but I won’t be selectively outgoing anymore.

In high school, I could barely go two classrooms down without seeing someone and stopping to talk to them, and I want college to be the same way. It’s really impossible to know everyone at your college but reaching out isn’t that hard for me to do, I’ve just been lazy. I haven’t put in as much effort as I should be putting in and I know that if I want to keep some of the amazing friendships that I currently have, I need to not be distant.

It’s easy to drift away when emotions and events start piling up. Sometimes, the only thing I want to do is just lay in bed and not think about my to-do lists and schedules and problems that I have.

Once I start doing that though, I get sucked in and it becomes so hard to get the energy to get up and move. I don’t want that to be the case anymore. I don’t want to hide away with the “what ifs” and speculation as to why I didn’t go or get invited. From now on, I’m just going to go, and then see what happens.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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To My Best Friends, Thank You

I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you.

I have gone through many friends in the past few years, some that lasted a while some that only lasted a few months, but you know exactly when you found your perfect person, soulmate, best friend, the one that will never get away. It’s the friends that stick with you through the toughest times and stay.

The ones you call at 3:00 a.m. because you got into a fight with your boyfriend and can’t sleep and they stay on the phone until your ready to sleep. The ones that you can count on to pick you up because you need a ride no matter where you are.

Dear Best Friends,

I just wanted to thank you for being you and for letting me be me. Thank you for letting me feel so much like myself when I’m with you. Thank you for sharing in my happiest moments, and for listening to my saddest stories and giving compassion and empathy from wherever you are. Thank you for being the only person I ever want to confide in. Thank you for being the most beautiful person, inside and out.

Thank you for making the world a better place, just by being in it. Thank you for defining selfless, always putting others before yourself, you are going to change the world just as much as you have changed mine. Thank you for all the memories we made at Disney this year on our senior trip. Thank you for practically being my second Mom.

Thank you for setting the bar so high and making it impossible to find another friend as good as you. Thank you for making these past years we have been friends feel like forever and for giving me enough memories to last a lifetime, but not ending there.

Thank you for making me hurt when I miss you, but for taking the hurt away when I see you. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for the absolute privilege of being able to call you my best friend, thank you for being my person. Thank you for giving me these reasons, and a million more, to be thankful for.

I sometimes find myself looking back on my life and realizing how huge of a part you have played in keeping me steady when the rest of my world has been falling apart. How you have known what to say and do in the moments when I have felt all control slipping through my fingers.

Even if it’s just dropping everything and taking me for coffee, shopping and listening to me try to untangle the mess I call my life. Thank you for those days when the rest of the world is against me, for making me feel less alone. For believing every silly dream which enters my head and being excited for me about things which no one else understands. Thank you for always validating my emotions, for taking my side, for telling me when I’m wrong, for being honest.

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