Perfectionism is informally embedded into your personality, character traits, and essentially consumes every single aspect of your day to day life. For lack of a better explanation, perfectionism is a commitment to unhappiness and disappointment.
With long drives comes the question, "why am I doing this?" But yet there is no choice, perfectionism is a trait of character, not something that one can just one day stop or end. It is seen as "failure" if something is not done perfectly. To what measures the standards of "perfect"?
Perfectionists, or at least from my perspective, feel as though they need to be the "best" or in some way please everyone, and succeed flawlessly at everything that they do. This is unattainable and challenging at the very least, because how can someone possibly please "everyone"? How am I pleasing myself?
Every single day, is automatically striving to have a "perfect" appearance, overall work and/ or academic performance, social interaction, accompanied with flawless evaluations from others, and an overall flawless outcome in every thing that you take part in: each and every day is "perfect".
Perfectionists want what everyone wants, to be loved, cared for, and cherished. I hope that I can make my parents proud, in spite of my past "failures".
My one and only goal is that if someone has been struggling with perfectionism, even in the slightest, that reading this will he of some comfort or help.
Xoxo
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1. "Haunt" your friends.
Follow them into their house and cause a ruckus.
2. Sneak into movie theaters.
Going to the cinema alone is good for your mental health, says science
Going to the cinema alone is good for your mental health, says sciencewww.newstalk.com
Considering that the monthly cost of subscribing to a media-streaming service like Netflix is oft...
Free movies...what else to I have to say?
3. Sneak into the pantry and grab a snack without judgment.
Late night snacks all you want? Duh.
4. Reenact "Hollow Man" and play Kevin Bacon.
America's favorite son? And feel what it's like to be in a MTV Movie Award nominated film? Sign me up.
5. Wear a mask and pretend to be a floating head.
Just another way to spook your friends in case you wanted to.
6. Hold objects so they'll "float."
"Oh no! A floating jar of peanut butter."
7. Win every game of hide-and-seek.
Just stand out in the open and you'll win.
8. Eat some food as people will watch it disappear.
Even everyday activities can be funny.
9. Go around pantsing your friends.
Even pranks can be done; not everything can be good.
10. Not have perfect attendance.
You'll say here, but they won't see you...
11. Avoid anyone you don't want to see.
Whether it's an ex or someone you hate, just use your invisibility to slip out of the situation.
12. Avoid responsibilities.
Chores? Invisible. People asking about social life? Invisible. Family being rude? Boom, invisible.
13. Be an expert on ding-dong-ditch.
Never get caught and have the adrenaline rush? I'm down.
14. Brag about being invisible.
Be the envy of the town.
But don't, I repeat, don't go in a locker room. Don't be a pervert with your power. No one likes a Peeping Tom.
Good luck, folks.
1. The importance of traditions.
Sometimes traditions seem like a silly thing, but the fact of it is that it's part of who you are. You grew up this way and, more than likely, so did your parents. It is something that is part of your family history and that is more important than anything.
women in street dancing
Photo by sydney Rae on Unsplash
2. How to be thankful for family and friends.
No matter how many times they get on your nerves or make you mad, they are the ones who will always be there and you should never take that for granted.
man and woman standing in front of louver door
Photo by Lucas Lenzi on Unsplash
3. How to give back.
When tragedy strikes in a small town, everyone feels obligated to help out because, whether directly or indirectly, it affects you too. It is easy in a bigger city to be able to disconnect from certain problems. But in a small town those problems affect everyone.
man in black t-shirt holding coca cola bottle
Photo by Joel Muniz on Unsplash
4. What the word "community" really means.
Along the same lines as #3, everyone is always ready and willing to lend a helping hand when you need one in a small town and to me that is the true meaning of community. It's working together to build a better atmosphere, being there to raise each other up, build each other up, and pick each other up when someone is in need. A small town community is full of endless support whether it be after a tragedy or at a hometown sports game. Everyone shows up to show their support.
red and white coca cola signage
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5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.
People say this to others all the time, but it takes on a whole new meaning in a small town. It is true that life is about the journey, but when you're from a small town, you know it's about the journey because the journey probably takes longer than you spend at the destination. Everything is so far away that it is totally normal to spend a couple hours in the car on your way to some form of entertainment. And most of the time, you're gonna have as many, if not more, memories and laughs on the journey than at the destination.
man holding luggage photo
Photo by Mantas Hesthaven on Unsplash
6. The consequences of making bad choices.
Word travels fast in a small town, so don't think you're gonna get away with anything. In fact, your parents probably know what you did before you even have a chance to get home and tell them. And forget about being scared of what your teacher, principle, or other authority figure is going to do, you're more afraid of what your parents are gonna do when you get home.
topless boy in blue denim jeans riding red bicycle during daytime
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7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.
Everyone deserves a chance. Most people don't have ill-intentions and you can't live your life guarding against every one else just because a few people in your life have betrayed your trust.
trust spelled with wooden letter blocks on a table
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8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.
While small towns are not always extremely diverse, they do contain people with a lot of different stories, struggle, and backgrounds. In a small town, it is pretty hard to exclude anyone because of who they are or what they come from because there aren't many people to choose from. A small town teaches you that just because someone isn't the same as you, doesn't mean you can't be great friends.
Everyone is Welcome signage
Photo by Katie Moum on Unsplash
9. How to be my own, individual person.
In a small town, you learn that it's okay to be who you are and do your own thing. You learn that confidence isn't how beautiful you are or how much money you have, it's who you are on the inside.
man with cap and background with red and pink wall l
Photo by Andre Hunter on Unsplash
10. How to work for what I want.
Nothing comes easy in life. They always say "gardens don't grow overnight" and if you're from a small town you know this both figuratively and literally. You certainly know gardens don't grow overnight because you've worked in a garden or two. But you also know that to get to the place you want to be in life it takes work and effort. It doesn't just happen because you want it to.
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11. How to be great at giving directions.
If you're from a small town, you know that you will probably only meet a handful of people in your life who ACTUALLY know where your town is. And forget about the people who accidentally enter into your town because of google maps. You've gotten really good at giving them directions right back to the interstate.
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12. How to be humble.
My small town has definitely taught me how to be humble. It isn't always about you, and anyone who grows up in a small town knows that. Everyone gets their moment in the spotlight, and since there's so few of us, we're probably best friends with everyone so we are as excited when they get their moment of fame as we are when we get ours.
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13. To be well-rounded.
Going to a small town high school definitely made me well-rounded. There isn't enough kids in the school to fill up all the clubs and sports teams individually so be ready to be a part of them all.
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14. How to be great at conflict resolution.
In a small town, good luck holding a grudge. In a bigger city you can just avoid a person you don't like or who you've had problems with. But not in a small town. You better resolve the issue fast because you're bound to see them at least 5 times a week.
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15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.
One of my favorite things about growing up in a rural area was being able to go outside and go exploring and not have to worry about being in danger. There is nothing more exciting then finding a new place somewhere in town or in the woods and just spending time there enjoying the natural beauty around you.
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16. To be prepared for anything.
You never know what may happen. If you get a flat tire, you better know how to change it yourself because you never know if you will be able to get ahold of someone else to come fix it. Mechanics might be too busy, or more than likely you won't even have enough cell service to call one.
orange white and black bag
Photo by Mathurin NAPOLY / matnapo on Unsplash
17. That you don't always have to do it alone.
It's okay to ask for help. One thing I realized when I moved away from my town for college, was how much my town has taught me that I could ask for help is I needed it. I got into a couple situations outside of my town where I couldn't find anyone to help me and found myself thinking, if I was in my town there would be tons of people ready to help me. And even though I couldn't find anyone to help, you better believe I wasn't afraid to ask.
girl sitting on gray rocks
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18. How to be creative.
When you're at least an hour away from normal forms of entertainment such as movie theaters and malls, you learn to get real creative in entertaining yourself. Whether it be a night looking at the stars in the bed of a pickup truck or having a movie marathon in a blanket fort at home, you know how to make your own good time.
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19. To brush off gossip.
It's all about knowing the person you are and not letting others influence your opinion of yourself. In small towns, there is plenty of gossip. But as long as you know who you really are, it will always blow over.
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You have taught me that you don't always have to strong. You are allowed to break down as long as you pick yourself back up and keep moving forward. When life had you at your worst moments, you allowed your friends to be there for you and to help you. You let them in and they helped pick you up. Even in your darkest hour you showed so much strength. I know that you don't believe in yourself as much as you should but you are unbelievably strong and capable of anything you set your mind to.
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Your passion to make a difference in the world is unbelievable. You put your heart and soul into your endeavors and surpass any personal goal you could have set. Watching you do what you love and watching you make a difference in the lives of others is an incredible experience. The way your face lights up when you finally realize what you have accomplished is breathtaking and I hope that one day I can have just as much passion you have.
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The love you have for your family is outstanding. Watching you interact with loved ones just makes me smile. You are so comfortable and you are yourself. I see the way you smile when you are around family and I wish I could see you smile like this everyday. You love with all your heart and this quality is something I wished I possessed.
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You inspire me to be the best version of myself. I look up to you. I feel that more people should strive to have the strength and passion that you exemplify in everyday life.You may be stubborn at points but when you really need help you let others in, which shows strength in itself. I have never been more proud to know someone and to call someone my role model. You have taught me so many things and I want to thank you. Thank you for inspiring me in life. Thank you for making me want to be a better person.
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Don't freak out
This is a rule you should continue to follow no matter what you do in life, but is especially helpful in this situation.
Email the professor
Around this time, professors are getting flooded with requests from students wanting to get into full classes. This doesn't mean you shouldn't burden them with your email; it means they are expecting interested students to email them. Send a short, concise message telling them that you are interested in the class and ask if there would be any chance for you to get in.
Attend the first class
people sitting on chair in front of computerOften, the advice professors will give you when they reply to your email is to attend the first class. The first class isn't the most important class in terms of what will be taught. However, attending the first class means you are serious about taking the course and aren't going to give up on it.
Keep attending class
Every student is in the same position as you are. They registered for more classes than they want to take and are "shopping." For the first couple of weeks, you can drop or add classes as you please, which means that classes that were once full will have spaces. If you keep attending class and keep up with assignments, odds are that you will have priority. Professors give preference to people who need the class for a major and then from higher to lower class year (senior to freshman).
Have a backup plan
For two weeks, or until I find out whether I get into my waitlisted class, I will be attending more than the usual number of classes. This is so that if I don't get into my waitlisted class, I won't have a credit shortage and I won't have to fall back in my backup class. Chances are that enough people will drop the class, especially if it is very difficult like computer science, and you will have a chance. In popular classes like art and psychology, odds are you probably won't get in, so prepare for that.
Remember that everything works out at the end
Life is full of surprises. So what if you didn't get into the class you wanted? Your life obviously has something else in store for you. It's your job to make sure you make the best out of what you have.
all stars lol GIF by LifetimeGiphy
1. What do you do for a living?
two women talking while looking at laptop computerPhoto by KOBU Agency on UnsplashWhat someone does for a living can tell a lot about who they are and what they're interested in! Their career reveals a lot more about them than just where they spend their time to make some money.
2. What's your favorite color?
OK, I get it, this seems like something you would ask a Kindergarten class, but I feel like it's always good to know someone's favorite color. You could always send them that Snapchat featuring you in that cute shirt you have that just so happens to be in their favorite color!
3. Do you have any siblings?
shallow focus photography of two boys doing wacky facesPhoto by Austin Pacheco on UnsplashThis one is actually super important because it's totally true that people grow up with different roles and responsibilities based on where they fall in the order. You can tell a lot about someone just based on this seemingly simple question.
4. What's your favorite television show?
OK, maybe this isn't a super important question, but you have to know ASAP if you can quote Michael Scott or not. If not, he probably isn't the one. Sorry, girl.
5. When is your birthday?
happy birthday balloons with happy birthday textPhoto by Morgan Lane on UnsplashYou can then proceed to do the thing that every girl does without admitting it and see how compatible your zodiacs are.
6. What's your biggest goal in life?
If you're like me, you have big goals that you want to reach someday, and you want a man behind you who also has big goals and understands what it's like to chase after a dream. If his biggest goal is to see how quickly he can binge-watch "Grey's Anatomy" on Netflix, you may want to move on.
7. If you had three wishes granted to you by a genie, what would they be?
itty-bitty living space." | The Genie shows Aladdin how… | Flickrwww.flickr.com
This is a go-to for an insight into their personality. Based on how they answer, you can tell if they're goofy, serious, or somewhere in between.
8. What's your favorite childhood memory?
For some, this may be a hard question if it involves a family member or friend who has since passed away. For others, it may revolve around a tradition that no longer happens. The answers to this question are almost endless!
9. If you could change one thing about your life, what would it be?
We all have parts of our lives and stories that we wish we could change. It's human nature to make mistakes. This question is a little bit more personal but can really build up the trust level.
10. Are you a cat or a dog person?
shallow focus photography of dog and catPhoto by Anusha Barwa on UnsplashI mean, duh! If you're a dog person, and he is a cat person, it's not going to work out.
11. Do you believe in a religion or any sort of spiritual power?
Personally, I am a Christian, and as a result, I want to be with someone who shares those same values. I know some people will argue that this question is too much in the talking stage, but why go beyond the talking stage if your personal values will never line up?
12. If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would it be?
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13. What is your ideal date night?
Hey, if you're going to go for it... go for it!
14. Who was/is your celebrity crush?
orange i have a crush on you neon light signagePhoto by Leonardo Sanches on UnsplashFor me, it was hands-down Nick Jonas. This is always a fun question to ask!
15. What's a good way to cheer you up if you're having a bad day?
Let's be real, if you put a label on it, you're not going to see your significant other at their best 24/7.
16. Do you have any tattoos?
5 Tattoos Artist That Will Make You Want A TattooThis can lead to some really good conversations, especially if they have a tattoo that has a lot of meaning to them!
17. Can you describe yourself in three words?
It's always interesting to see if how the person you're talking to views their personal traits lines ups with the vibes you're getting.
18. What makes you the most nervous in life?
woman biting pencil while sitting on chair in front of computer during daytimePhoto by JESHOOTS.COM on UnsplashThis question can go multiple different directions, and it could also be a launching pad for other conversations.
19. What's the best gift you have ever received?Â
Admittedly, I have asked this question to friends as well, but it's neat to see what people value.
20. What do you do to relax/have fun?
Work hard, play hard, right?
21. What are your priorities at this phase of your life?
a scrabbled wooden block spelling the word prizePhoto by Brett Jordan on UnsplashThis is always interesting because no matter how compatible your personalities may be, if one of you wants to be serious and the other is looking for something casual, it's just not going to work.
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