Growing up, I was never one to really show my emotions. I've always been one to put on a front that everything was fine and dandy, and in general lived life with a smile plastered on my face. Recently, however, I have discovered that it is totally okay to not always be okay -- I'm only human, after all, and my emotions show it.
We all go through bad days, and we all go through hard, life-defining moments. Sometimes it feels like, in these situations, you have to be tough and run about with a gleaming smile, as though you aren't breaking into a million pieces inside. I'm here to tell you that you don't have to be strong if you aren't feeling strong, and that sometimes being able to break down and admit that you are not okay is the first step towards becoming strong.
If I were always okay, I wouldn't be real. You are lying to yourself, and to everybody else, if you claim that you never have bad days or that you never feel sad, afraid, lonely, or confused -- these feelings are real, human feelings. It's okay to not always be okay.
Your negative feelings don't necessarily mean that you are a negative person, and your feelings of weakness don't necessarily mean that you are a weak person, either. What really demonstrates that somebody possesses strength and positivity is how they react to negative feelings and situations. When you are completely broken, it takes strength to reach out and ask for help. When you are going through loss, whether it be in the form of a break-up or death of a loved one, it takes a sense of positivity to get out there and still see the value and beauty in life.
For you to admit that you are not okay shows that you not only possess positivity, as you are actively seeking a positive change in your life, but that you also possess strength to speak up about not feeling okay and ask for help.
Perhaps the times when you are not okay are the times in life that matter the most, because these times allow you to grow and better understand the depths and complexity of your emotions. If everyone would stop putting up a wall to hide negative emotions, people would feel less alone in knowing that they are not the only ones that aren't always feeling okay.
Perhaps, through our vulnerability, we could feel more "real" and develop true bonds. We could help each other grow in strength and positivity. Perhaps, if we would admit when we aren't okay, our smiles and laughter would feel more genuine when we are okay, and we would have so much less of ourselves to hide from the world.
Perhaps we could all learn to love and understand each other a little more if we'd just learn that it is okay to not be okay -- we are only human and our emotions, both positive and negative, show it.
