Why I'm Not A Fan Of Hookup Culture
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Relationships

Why I'm Not A Fan Of Hookup Culture

There's more to life than one night of fun.

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Why I'm Not A Fan Of Hookup Culture
Psychology Today

Hookups. They’re quick and easy with no painful strings attached. You've had a few drinks, and there are a ton of sexy guys/girls here waiting to ravish you in dark corners. So, what’s the problem?

Call me old-fashioned. Call me a prude. But, I don't believe that today’s hookup culture is healthy or fun or easy. I've seen what frequent trysts do to people’s emotional states, and it’s not pretty. I've known many people in high school and college who hooked up with people at parties or through social media, all searching for the perfect person. I knew a group of girls who would go out and “guy hunt” like there was no tomorrow. The result was a massive hangover, a boatload of regret and many nights of desperate texting.

Sometimes, it may seem that “the hookup that went wrong” wasn't your fault. The guy/girl you found turned out to be a jerk, and you'll have to find someone better. While not every single hookup ends this way, the hookup stories that I've heard all ended badly. Some people may not understand that their hookups were their choice. Yes, you can't always tell what people are really like, but you chose that person. Whether it’s a kiss or sex, you decided to take that chance.

Hooking up is supposed to be a casual thing, yet the aftermath can bring a world of hurt. Why is that? I think some people who feel hurt after a hookup deep down want more. More than casual. More than a rush of hormones.

Someone who truly knows you and cares about you isn't easy to come by. While I haven't had many boyfriends, I’d rather have that be the case than make myself vulnerable to being thrown away by a hookup. I’ve never wanted to just find someone for a night, someone who would give a nice fix or ease my loneliness. Waiting, I believe, is worth it. Yes, there are periods when it would be nice to have someone to kiss, to touch. But then I remind myself that any hookup I could find would be temporary and emotionless.

I'm certainly not saying that people who hook up or have hooked up are bad people. But I strongly believe that it’s important to wait and find someone who appreciates us for who we really are. That person, the one who comes out of nowhere and sweeps you off your feet … he/she will be so much better than any hookup out there.

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