Why I'm Finally Choosing Me

Why I'm Finally Choosing Me

And why it's completely okay.

I'm the type of person that will always put the entire world before me, no matter what. If I'm having a horrible day, but so is someone else, I will brush my feelings under the rug and give them my heart to dump their worries and sorrows into. Now, there is certainly nothing wrong with being a selfless person and being a friend to those who need it. However, there is a line that should be drawn. A line that allows you to live your life and get the help and love that you need without absorbing the rest of the world's issues, negativity and concerns.

My entire life I have never known what this fine line was, and it's still just vaguely recognizable, but it's becoming all the more clear to me as I grow each and every day. I never understood that it was okay for me to solely focus on myself, my needs, and my happiness, until focusing on myself was the only choice that I had. People who give the most, often receive the least, and can very easily be taken advantage of or taken for granted. Recently I have learned that although I do have those people who will give and take with me in a healthy way, there are more people than not who will take what they want and leave you out to dry.

This is why I am finally choosing me. Yes, I need support along the way from those people that I trust with my life, but I have to learn to have the strength to stand up on my own. It's not easy to say, you know what, no, I'm not going to be there for this person today because I'm having a rough day and need to get myself back on track. In fact, sometimes it really, really sucks to think in that mindset; it feels so selfish and cruel. However, in life, your health and your happiness ultimately come first, and there will always be another person who is having a better day than you who can be there for that other someone.

Being the shoulder to cry on all of the time will only bring you down. I'm choosing me so that I can be fully happy in this life. I'm choosing me so that I can be so sure of myself that I won't feel awful if I just can't be there for someone one day. I'm choosing me because I am just as important as the next person and I deserve to feel that way about myself.

It's going to take some time, and it's not going to be easy, but I know that putting myself first for the first time in my life is the biggest step in the right direction I've taken in a long time. At the end of the day, you are the sailor of your own ship. Don't rely on anyone else to direct your sails. Learn to do it all on your own.

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8 Struggles Of Being 21 And Looking 12

The struggle is real, my friends.

“You'll appreciate it when you're older." Do you know how many times my mom has told me this? Too many to count. Every time I complain about looking young that is the response I get. I know she's right, I will love looking young when I'm in my 40s. However, looking young is a real struggle in your 20s. Here's what we have to deal with:

1. Everyone thinks your younger sister or brother is the older one.

True story: someone actually thought my younger sister was my mom once. I've really gotten used to this but it still sucks.

2. You ALWAYS get carded.

Every. Single. Time. Since I know I look young, I never even bothered with a fake ID my first couple of years of college because I knew it would never work. If I'm being completely honest, I was nervous when I turned 21 that the bartender would think my real driver's license was a fake.

3. People look at your driver's license for an awkward amount of time.

So no one has actually thought my real driver's license is fake but that doesn't stop them from doing a double take and giving me *that look.* The look that says, “Wow, you don't look that old." And sometimes people will just flat out say that. The best part is this doesn't just happen when you're purchasing alcohol. This has happened to me at the movie theater.

SEE ALSO: 10 Things People Who Look 12 Hate Hearing

4. People will give you *that look* when they see you drinking alcohol.

You just want to turn around and scream “I'M 21, IT'S LEGAL. STOP JUDGING ME."

5. People are shocked to find out you're in college.

If I had a dollar for every time someone had a shocked expression on their face after I told them I'm a junior in college I could pay off all of my student loan debt. It's funny because when random people ask me how school is going, I pretty much assume they think I'm in high school and the shocked look on their face when I start to talk about my college classes confirms I'm right.

6. For some reason wearing your hair in a ponytail makes you look younger.

I don't understand this one but it's true. Especially if I don't have any makeup on I could honestly pass for a child.

7. Meeting an actual 12-year-old who looks older than you.

We all know one. That random 12-year-old who looks extremely mature for her age and you get angry because life isn't fair.

8. Being handed a kids' menu.

This is my personal favorite. It happens more often than it should. The best part of this is it's your turn to give someone a look. The look that says, "You've got to be kidding me".

Looking young is a real struggle and I don't think everyone realizes it. However, with all the struggles that come with looking young, we still take advantage of it. Have you ever gone to a museum or event where if you're under a certain age you get in for a discounted price? Yeah? Well, that's when I bet you wish you were us. And kids' meals are way cheaper than regular meals so there have definitely been a couple times when I've kept that kids' menu.

So, all in all, it's not the worst thing in the world but it's definitely a struggle.

Cover Image Credit: Jenna Collins

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16 'Golden Girls' Quotes That Are Still Golden In 2019

Blanche, Dorothy, Rose, and Sophia..four unique middle aged women from different backgrounds under one roof.


One of the greatest shows of all time (at least in my opinion) is Golden Girls. I was not born yet when it first aired in 1985, but thankfully it is on Hulu. Here are just some of the many quotes from the series's seven-year run.

1. Crying is for plain women. Pretty women go shopping. -Blanche Devereaux

2. Go to sleep sweetheart. Pray for brains. -Dorothy Zbornak

3. Dorothy, was Sophia naked just now, or does her dress really need ironing. -Rose Nylund

4. People waste their time pondering whether a glass if half empty of half full. Me, I just drink whatever's in the glass. -Sophia Petrillo

5. I've been having a giood time, and there wasn't even a man in the room. -Blanche Devereaux

6. As they say in St. Olaf, Helgenbargenflergenflurfennerfen. -Rose Nylund

7. Have I given you any indication that I care? -Sophia Petrillo

8. I'm as jumpy as a virgin in a prison rodeo. -Blanche Devereaux

9. Blanche, I could get herpes listening to this story -Dorothy Zbornak

10. I had a knack for coming up with the firmest, most appealing yams. -Rose Nylund

11. No, I will not have a nice day! -Dorothy Zbornak

12. Look, you didn't ask for my opinion, but I'm old, so I'm giving it anyway. -Sophia Petrillo

13. There is a fine line between having a good time and being a wanton slut. My toe has been on that line. Blanche Devereaux

14. You'll have to excuse my mother. She suffered a slight stroke a few years ago which rendered her totally annoying. -Dorothy Zbornak

15. Everybody likes me. -Rose Nylund

16. Silly rabbi. Tricks are for kids. -Sophia Petrillo

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