Hillary Rodham Clinton, the Democratic frontrunner for the 2016 presidential election, has long been under attack for her controversial standings. From Benghazi to private emails, she has elicited a wild response in the public. But I’m here to discuss the more pressing issues: Why she can't be "my girl."

Hillary is many things. Under her handle on Twitter, she proclaims that she is a wife, mom, grandma, and 2016 presidential candidate. She is also, according to her Twitter, a hair icon and pantsuit aficionado. When I read this, I was left disappointed in Hillary, but, alas, more and more journalism is now centered on appearance, so I guess Clinton is smart to play up her knowledge on all things fashion.

I just didn’t assume that her hair and her pantsuits would be the things she wanted to focus on. Obviously Clinton’s status as a "pantsuit aficionado" must be helpful to her career as a politician, right? How else would she think that her policies would matter if she didn’t look good while defending them? These things, I believe, are what make Clinton a controversial woman of power. Now, while we’re at it, let me be clear that I am not stating that Clinton is controversial because she’s a woman. I think a large part of the problem is not actually that she’s a woman at all, but that we have judgmental perceptions of what women should be. It’s not her, it’s us. But us saying that is not going to change the problem.

Clinton is not what I would consider a girl’s girl, whatever that may mean. But for some reason I want her to be a girl’s girl. I expect to her to be a girl’s girl. Her persona doesn’t seem to really exude warmth, and this is only seen as a problem because she’s a woman. And I'm part of the problem because I expect more from her. Hillary isn't exactly who I would invite over for a sleepover, and because of this I get frustrated. I want her to be like our girl Beyonce, someone we want to be friends with. Why does this matter, though? It’s because, as a woman, she's supposed to be not only a hardass political inspiration (a label I’m willing to copyright for Clinton), but also to be friendly, and delightful. I do not expect this from men. I don’t want to have a sleepover with Ted Cruz either, but I don’t let that affect my opinion of him (which isn’t very high anyway). Why is Clinton, a fierce competitor, expected to be a better person than any other male politician is? Why are women held to higher standards? Her husband, Bill Clinton, was caught in myriad scandals, and his time in office is not looked down upon because of any them. We still revere him, for Christ’s sake. His time in office is actually looked upon as a good moment for America. What’s up with that? No one’s asking who Bill is wearing!

Clinton is portrayed by the media as having a superhuman thirst for success, and that is detrimental for her. You don’t hear anyone saying this about Cruz (for many reasons). Put Clinton’s drive for success on any white-male-politician figure, and folks, we have America’s history! And, by demanding this much of Clinton, by demanding that she is both someone who has the determination of a cheetah chasing a gazelle but also someone who I want to have over for drinks, sets her up to fail. Men politicians mess up all the time socially, but yet they are still in positions of power. I will admit it—from Hillary, I want it all. So when people attack her appearance, my feminist voice roars. That is not good journalism. But when she wants to be "America’s Hero," I criticize her for hubris. One way or another I lose, and Clinton comes off as not good enough. As long as she looks super rad, though, I’m into it.

Her email scandal (much to Bernie's chagrin), is unfortunately still a main point of discussion. Sure, she believes in equal rights for women, sure she’s all for marriage equality (although this has been a long time developing), but what about her character as a person? Why does she seem shady? Why is she not perfect? Why isn’t she more like Bill? (Oh, he cheated on her? Well, his policies were still good, right?) Of course, of course, (I hope at least) I’m being facetious. In all seriousness, I am pro-Hillary, but in order to be pro-someone you have to understand all of them – the pros and the cons, and see which outweighs the other. Hillary has had some bad moments, but who hasn’t? Are you saying Bush never made mistakes? And he was in office for two terms. Obama for sure has had his moments, but does that mean he shouldn’t have been in office? Half the Republican Party has made mistakes, whether it’s been comments about "legitimate" rape or riding across the country with a dog on the roof (Mitt Romney circa 2012). Maybe it’s time we stop focusing on the bad and start focusing on the good. Politicians are people, my friend, so let’s embrace them, OK?

Look, I know that any politician, or any public figure for that matter, is going to get caught up in scandals. But as a woman, Clinton has it harder. Hillary is held to higher standards than others are, and we as a society are ready and willing to be disappointed when she inevitably doesn’t meet them. Now I know that my argument that Clinton is more controversial because she’s a woman will be fought against. I know it will be chocked up to me being an angry feminist and that I’m a man hater, but I urge you to take a second look.

Take her daughter, for example, who as she was growing up, was all too often discussed as being ugly. Why does this matter? You don’t see me knocking down the door of Trump's son, but that hasn’t been a topic of discussion, has it? Michelle Obama, on the other hand, is often praised for her fashion, but what about all the other great things she has done since her husband has been elected? They are labeled as a "first lady," but I want them to be more than that -- more than just a "lady." I want Hillary to be a badass and, most of all, I want her to be my girl, and the problem isn't that she doesn't come across as "our girl"-- it's that we as a society look down on her because of it. And I don't think I'm alone in feeling this way. Perhaps that's why society pays more attention to her pantsuits and her personality than her policies. And perhaps, at a closer look, that's really our problem, not Hillary's.