Have you ever met someone who loves to give compliments? The girl at the party who starts a conversation by telling you that she loves your shirt, or that she would do anything for your style? Or the boy sitting next to you in a coffee shop that taps you on the shoulder just to tell you that he thinks you have beautiful eyes? For most of my life I have gone out of my way to be that person and people don’t always seem to understand why.

Somehow, in this day and age, giving compliments has become misconstrued into a somewhat negative concept. By telling someone that I like what they are wearing, I am by no means looking for people to like me. I am not acting desperate or insecure in a way that complimenting others means that I aspire to have what they have. By complimenting someone that I don’t know, I am doing just that. I am telling them that I admire something I’ve noticed about them and here are the reasons why.

A series of experiments by Princeton Psychologists determined that it takes a mere 1/10^th of a second to form judgement- whether it be good or bad. In that 1/10^th second, we determine (what we assume) we do and do not like about a person. We are seasoned to look at both ourselves and others and instantly pick up on the things that don’t seem like they fit- things that are out of the “normal”. We catch ourselves comparing to others, for good and for bad, to justify how we look and act on a daily basis, only to end up focusing on the parts of ourselves that are flawed. In an instant, we can choose to pick out the bad or recognize the good and, in a world that seems to love to knock people down rather than build them up, it seems only fitting to choose to focus on the positive.

Even so, people tend to gravitate toward the more negative thoughts of those around us- not only thinking them, but saying them. Commenting them. Supporting those who express them. Someone wise once said “The world is full of nice people. If you can’t find one, be one.” I thoroughly believe in the idea that, although the world may seem lost at times, there is still so much good in the most unsuspecting of places. Individuals can selflessly rise to help those in need and give their lives to save those they've yet to meet. And although giving a compliment to a total and complete stranger may seem like such a small solution to a universal problem, I can tell you that, to the one person you are complimenting who really needs it, it will make an entire world of difference.