Welcome to the city of Fulton, NY which is comprised of just under twelve thousand people. This is my hometown. And although it may not be small to some, it felt and still feels pretty small to me. I chose to leave my safe little city, full of people I know and love, to move three hours across the state to attend a college with a population itself that is about three quarters the size of Fulton, and that isn't including the surrounding city of fifty thousand people. The biggest difference to me was that here in my college town, I don't know every single face that I see. Here, I got a fresh new start. Here, I was just me.
During my freshman year of college, I missed my home a lot. I found myself so homesick sometimes that I was physically sick to my stomach. I would go home and see my friends and family and I felt better but after a while it just felt different, not bad different, just different--and so it was then that I started to realize that it was because each time I went back to Fulton, it felt a little bit less like home to me. Besides my friends and family, I felt like there was nothing there for me anymore. The city itself felt like ghost town sometimes. Each time I went home, I saw how much more run down the city was becoming in just the few short years since I left for college in the first place. An article went around last week among my Facebook friends from my hometown that expressed the degradation of the once thriving city of Fulton, NY. Most of the article hit points that I myself have experienced first hand. The city is nothing like it once was and has changed greatly even in my short 21 years. Both of my parents have lost jobs in the crashing economy of the city, and my family is among many who have relocated to neighboring towns and cities for some reasons as simple as just getting out of there because it seems like the whole place is disintegrating into a ghost of what it once was.
The article called Fulton a "sad story." A sad story, indeed. I feel like every month I log onto Facebook and see another tragedy that I wasn't prepared for. Kids I knew from high school seem to be dropping like flies; they're being arrested and they are dying. And it breaks my heart. Kids my age are getting married and starting families and staying in that town and I just don't understand how they could want to build a life there. When I go home to Fulton now, I smile because of all the great memories I have from growing up there, but then I get emotional because I get this broken feeling in my chest that reminds me that everything and nothing is the same there all at the same time...and I don't want the same, and I sure as hell don't want worse, so I know that I can't go back there for good.
Don't get me wrong, I am PROUD of where I come from. I grew up in a happy and supportive community of friends and family. I got an incredible education at my elementary, middle and high school and I was lucky enough to be able to go to the college of my dreams after that. This city gave me the tools and the foundation to take every opportunity that came my way and I am well on my way to pursuing my goals and dreams. But, that being said, under no circumstances do I want to be stuck in that small town forever. I am proud of where I come from, and a little piece of it will always be my home, but I am so glad I got out of there when I did. I am so glad I did not get stuck in that quiet little town, that seems to be getting quieter every single day.
