I never was one to fit in throughout my schooling, coming from a town of 3,000 if you didn't find the right friends in elementary school you were almost guaranteed to always struggle and unfortunately that's just how it was. Something about me was always different than a majority of my school and it made it hard to find people with the same humor and attitude that I had, I was awkward around most people that I talked to, I couldn't relate no matter how hard I tried. It's crazy to think that I was mad at my first grade self for being friends with the wrong people and that if I would've had different friends everything would have been easier for me. I graduated with a few close friends, but hoped and prayed that things would get better in college. You would think it would, new classes, new clubs, new roommate and floor mates, so many chances to find somewhere to fit in, I couldn't lose, right?

Wrong. Once college started I tried so hard to get out there, to be happy and confident and to find a group of people I finally fit in with, but it was harder than I had realized. With social media it's easy to make it look like you're having the time of your life, like you're surrounded by people who are just like you. Like you fit in, and that's how it looked to everyone. Though I looked like I fit in instantly, I didn't.

I tried to join clubs but I still never found anyone that shared a lot in common with me, no one I could really hold a conversation with and it was very discouraging. In January I decided to go through recruitment, I thought maybe, just maybe, I'll find a group I can really connect with. After going through, I didn't find a single sorority that just clicked with me and that was very hard on me, knowing that so many girls got that moment where they knew they finally fit in somewhere, while I was stuck sitting in my dorm room wishing I had the same.

Fast forward to March and I have finally come to realize I might never fit in, and that's not a bad thing. When I use to think about not fitting in it would make me so sad, I wasn't like everyone else, I didn't have 4,000 friends that shared my interests, and I wasn't constantly with other people. Now, I like it that way. I am unique and no one will ever be exactly like me. I have 3 close friends I wouldn't trade for the world, we are so different from each other but we work so well. I like being alone, I like my space, I can go get coffee by myself and not feel awkward compared to the girls that come in with multiple friends by their side. I believe that not fitting in taught me a lot about myself and will help me in my career to really stand out among others. In the words of every girls fictional British bad boy crush Ian Wallace, "Why fit in when you were born to stand out."