We complain all the time whether we know it or not. Millennials especially have been hounded by previous generations for complaining too much. The average person complains 15-30 times a day. Conventionally, complaining is viewed a negative exercise promoting weakness, insecurity and stress. However, recent views on the topic reveal that complaining is a tool to get rid of negative emotions and also find sympathy and attention in what already is a stressful life. Regardless of whether complaining is a beneficial or harmful practice, there are various reasons for it.
1. Negativity Breeds Friendship
What better way to make new friends than by venting together on the various atrocities commonly experienced in daily life, such as the usual hot weather complaint? This purpose for complaining almost seems contradictory, but for centuries, humans have adapted the practice of establishing bonds with negativity.
2. Help Rejecting Complainers
You had just given up. It was your fiftieth attempt and you do not want to try anymore. You just want to vent and release some of that negativity to your friends. So, you go and complain about your failure to your best friend. They do what all good friends do, offer advice. Without even listening you reject their courtesy by explaining how you already tried the suggested method and hit another roadblock. This keeps going on until your friend gives up just like you, and you both share in the camaraderie of failure.
3. I am special and I know it.
Usually, we do this when we want to distance ourselves from the general population. For example, people who eat school lunches are gross. The person who says this statement usually knows that their listeners partake in this action, but act as if they are wholly unaware in order to establish superiority while making others around them uncomfortable.
4. Power Struggles
We have all been in this situation before. Two friends, who we support no matter what, are suddenly against each other for some inconsequential reason. They both vent their frustration against the other in front of you in attempt to lure you to their side of reasoning. If you submit and agree with one of their complaints, you run the risk of endangering a friendship. In this situation, complaining becomes a powerful tool to control others.
5. Saving Face
You messed up again. Now it is time to choose what you are going to blame for your failure because surely it is not your fault and your parent, teacher, or coach will definitely understand it’s not your fault. So, you go ahead and blame the horrible traffic for being late again to practice. You blame your teacher for your terrible grades to your parents. You blame your parents for wasting your time for studying to your teacher.
Although I would usually end this with stating that complaining is either good or bad, the reality is that complaining exists in a grey area with regards to its benefits or setbacks. However, too much of anything could be harmful, and too little could cause stress to build up and finally unload. The only truth is that complaining is a part of human nature, and there is no escape from it.
