Lately, I've been hearing a lot of friends saying: "I can't find a nice guy/girl!" or, "there aren't any good guys/girls at this school." I've heard this from both male and female friends. Frankly, I agree. But I don't think it's because there actually aren't any good people at this school. I think it's because of our own personal rules and preferences on dating.
Here are four reasons why you can't find a "good" guy or girl to date at the University of Arizona:
1. You have above average standards. By no means am I saying that standards are bad. It's great to want the best qualities in the person you may date, but what do those standards entail? Are they based on stunning looks, a built body and gorgeous smile? Or are they based on an intellectual mind, a good sense of humor and loyalty?
Our generation tends to prioritize physical appearance over personality and inner being. Being physically attracted to someone is important, but looks are only skin deep. Next time you think that there aren't any nice guys or girls at this school, remember all the times you shut down someone who genuinely wanted your attention. Take a chance on someone who might be more funny than they are cute or pretty. Stop friend-zoning the people who might not be your exact "type."
2. You are afraid to to leave your comfort zone. Guys, have you ever wished that a girl would come up to you first at a party for once? Well, this doesn't happen often and I will tell you why: a lot of college age people, especially girls, feel that it is desperate or embarrassing to approach a person first. But how will you ever meet new people if you don't take the initiative to say hello?
Step out of your comfort zone, approach a new guy or girl at a party, introduce yourself and ask them to dance. You will be surprised at how easy it is and how many new relationships will result from it. Taking a chance on someone you spot across the room is well worth it, I promise!
3. You worry too much about what others think. So many times people worry about what others will think of who they are dating. He or she may not be in the best fraternity or sorority or be the best-looking person at the school, but if you like them and they make you laugh and smile then who cares what anyone else thinks! Stop letting outside influences affect your decisions. Dating and relationships should be based on your own happiness and well being - yours and yours alone.
4. You are downgrading yourself. College students tend to degrade themselves when it comes to dating. They will say to themselves, "I'm not pretty enough for him" or "she would never talk to me." You are pretty enough and she will talk to you if you give yourself more credit and have a positive attitude. You are more valuable and special than you think and you deserve the best, but you have to believe it's true. When you exude confidence and positivity, people will be undeniably attracted to you no matter what!
Dating can be difficult but having an open mind and letting go of superficial standards will make it a lot easier and more fun. Challenge yourself to talk to people you wouldn't normally talk to and be more receptive to the "nice" guys and girls at this school!
